[Daneclark]

Now that I understand that I have two different streams of conciousness thanks to my dissociative identity disorder, does anyone have any advice on how to get by?

Right now it feels like I need both streams but there's only one that I actually want. However, these two streams feel like they accidentally "traded" a few things with eachother it's very tricky to get things back into the stream where they belong. Does this make sense to anyone? Is there any advice anyone can give?

 

[dope]

I have a thread on all my advice if you'd like to check it: http://www.dpselfhelp.com/forum/index.php?/topic/72922-all-of-my-advice/

I understood what you said, and I'm sorry that that is something you have to deal with currently, but remember that both "streams" are within you so I think that you can get what you want from each "stream" and create a fitting "stream" for yourself.

 

[Daneclark]

I have a thread on all my advice if you'd like to check it: http://www.dpselfhelp.com/forum/index.php?/topic/72922-all-of-my-advice/
I understood what you said, and I'm sorry that that is something you have to deal with currently, but remember that both "streams" are within you so I think that you can get what you want from each "stream" and create a fitting "stream" for yourself.

That's what I was trying to do. It's just that sometimes it feels like each stream is written in a completely different language that's incompatible with the other. And one of those streams has alot of ground that only exists because I mistakenly decided to follow the "glitchier" stream and I just got too used to it, or something like that.

 

[dope]

That's what I was trying to do. It's just that sometimes it feels like each stream is written in a completely different language that's incompatible with the other. And one of those streams has alot of ground that only exists because I mistakenly decided to follow the "glitchier" stream and I just got too used to it, or something like that.

Well, now try to follow the stream that feels right for you. Even though it's hard to believe, you still have all the control, your life works the way you want it to work.

 

[Daneclark]

It's all tangled up in a way where following just one stream has become impossible.

 

[dope]

Do this: write down everything you want from each stream, and block anything that doesn't follow what you want.

 

[derrrr]

Sounds interesting! How would you describe these "streams"?

 

[Daneclark]

Dope, I have been writing things down and trying to block things. It does help, but sometimes the things that I want to block can be very sneaky

 

[MLNDLRWMN]

That's a great first step to identify the two streams of consciousness! Give yourself rewards for noticing that and making that big progress. Remember that there is no leap from here to the distant future and that's ok. The primary task is to be gentle with yourself and acknowledge all of the progress you make, even if the progress is to still be hanging in, dealing. The secondary task is to make tiny, positive steps on a regular basis. By noticing two streams of consciousness, you are seeing the contrast of what you want and what you don't want. This is the essence of life. Now you can choose to acknowledge each thought as one you want vs. one you don't want. The more you focus on the ones you want, the more of them you will have. That's the goal - not to eliminate the thoughts you don't want, but to tip the balance so there are more of those you do want. That's the best any of us can do on this planet. Getting better is just a lessening of the intensity between the two. The bad get less horrific and the good are more pleasant than high - everything is more moderate but up the scale. Don't lose sight of the fact that you are on your way.

 

[dope]

Dope, I have been writing things down and trying to block things. It does help, but sometimes the things that I want to block can be very sneaky

You do? Good! Keep doing it. If you do it for a while you'll notice improvements!

 

[Daneclark]

I probably do need both streams in order to stay balanced. But the one that I dont want just has something very wrong about it that's just hard to describe - it feels like it was created by a version of myself that doesn't exist anymore but still tries to sneak back into existence because I was so used to it.

 

[Daneclark]

It's a version of myself that's not supposed to exist and only exists because of some poorly judged attempts I made at trying to fix a problem that I didn't fully understand, but I need it to keep things in balance now. This version of myself also made the mistake of thinking that all ground has to be "neutral", or "one dimensional" or "backwards" or something. It's a big mess.

 

[Daneclark]

The precursor to this version of myself was created when my brain learned to deconstruct things in ways it never had before. I'm able to nullify these deconstructions by focusing on the stream that I want, but as I've said the other stream us very sneaky because it wants balance and stuff

 

[Daneclark]

I probably do need both streams in order to stay balanced. But the one that I dont want just has something very wrong about it that's just hard to describe - it feels like it was created by a version of myself that doesn't exist anymore but still tries to sneak back into existence because I was so used to it.

It's a version of myself that's not supposed to exist and only exists because of some poorly judged attempts I made at trying to fix a problem that I didn't fully understand, but I need it to keep things in balance now. This version of myself also made the mistake of thinking that all ground has to be "neutral", or "one dimensional" or "backwards" or something. It's a big mess.

The precursor to this version of myself was created when my brain learned to deconstruct things in ways it never had before. I'm able to nullify these deconstructions by focusing on the stream that I want, but as I've said the other stream us very sneaky because it wants balance and stuff

I already have a pretty good plan for dealing with all this, but these kinds of things take time to fix and I want to be able to do so while maintaining the me I want to be and staying in balance, so I could still use all the advice I can get