hey i totally feel you on this, ill be in work, and ill feel like, where am i what am i doing here, or ill be at school and feel like whats going on, its scary as hell, but i just tell myself its my dp/dr and im fine... oh well, ya no. what can you do?
Remember it is just our minds tricking us.... We know who we are, we remember things, we function, it is just a tricky perception that scares the hell out you... Keep busy, watch a movie, do anything but focus on the tricks and scare tatics of DP/DR..... This is a totally beatable thing, but the more we self monitor the harder it is to give up. I fall in the trap, but am getting better little by little .... Hang it there everyone... And if your watching MOnday night football right now GO REDSKINS!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ever seen those little bamboo chinese finger cuffs you can buy in the dollar stores? You put one index finger in one end and the other index finger in the other end. Now if you struggle and try to pull it off you can't get them off , but when you relax, and just go with the cuff it can easily be removed.
When we constantly look at each thought and wonder is this the thought that puts us over the edge, is this where I loose reality all together then it becomes more difficult to get out . The more we do it the more we are in our heads. If you are cognative then it is truly just a weird perception or state of mind you are going through. YOU are still here, you are not likely to go crazy, If you have seen a professional they can diagnose you and what your disorder is, The likelyhood of you slipping off into insanity is probably as likely that you will be picked to take a ride on the Space Shuttle. Get out of the bed, get off the computer, stop checking each thought and with time, no not one day, not two days, maybe not even two months, but it will get better . You will have days where you think all the progress you made is out the door. In most cases it is the anxiety that is keeping our minds driven to this state. YOu know why I know.. Times like yesterday, when my dad was in the emergency room struggling to breath, guess what I was totally connected to his needs not mine, so no DP/DR at all .... Find something to get totally lost in and you will see what I mean.. If you are pyschotic , or your Pyschiatrist thinks your headed that way,he will take the appropriate actions. I had my therapist tell me in the early stages of this that If I lost my identity or went pyschotic he would treat me for free the rest of my life. He said I love to get paid so do you see the chances of anything like that happening and me missing out on getting paid for your sessions are slim and none.
You have to stop the self monitoring it is the only way , the only way to feel better. No one said this task is easy , but you have to start somewhere. The silly obsessive thoughts we get are just that, the way things look is driven from the constant anxiety state we put ourselfs into. There are likely issues that are below the surface also which is why a good therapist that you can connect with is so important.. We burry ourselves in anxiety and obsessive thoughts for a reason or two, or three or more, there are reasons though .
Set some goals... what is it you want to accomplish ... Even if it as simple as I really want to be strong enough to walk in the park.. Then each day do something towards making it happen. This is our reality, this is the hand we have dealt ourselves sometimes, Ask your pyschiatrist if you can be allowed to visit a pych ward and observe the difference between your state and someone who has a real pyschosis.
If you haven't suffered with this all of your life, there must have been things you enjoyed before that you had fun doing.... Guess what, MAKE your self do them again, force yourself and soon you begin to feel yes I mean feel the enjoyment again...... I couldn't play my guitar 6 months ago because I couldn't feel the passion or express the song from my sould. BUt now I make myself do it....Over and over and the more I do it the more I start to feel the song again.
Yes it still sucks from time to time, yes I still get the ocassional AM I ME , but I quickly now re route my mind and realize it is a bunch of ANXIETY NOISE and there is not an ounce of truth to it, no matter how unreal things seem, or look, it is but a perception not a reality.
Guys, come on get up out the beds, get off the computer 24 hours if that is part of your checking in . You have to find a way to get out of your head, get totally involved in something other then your own thoughts...
GOod Luck,,, We just need to keep supporting each other and know and believe in our heart of hearts that the people who are treating us were schooled in this stuff , they no more then us ... if you don't have a therapist you trust...get one ....... Keep on keepin' on, you are there, you are the you you have always been. It is a dirty trick DP/DR
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