[Guest]

Ok, i just got back from seeing my therapist, and i guess every once in a while him and about 10 other therapists or so get together and have meetings where they all present a case of one of their clients and give each other insight and advice and opinions etc.... Well at his last meeting he presented my case.

I guess the other therapists presented the idea of that i could have smoked PCP without knowing it and thats why im feeling like this, the whole seizure thing was brought up &they had another idea/suggestion which is that i should look into getting a brain scan done. I asked him what would be the purpose of that and he said that it would be just to make sure their is nothing physically wrong with my brain, such as a lack of blood flow, or clotting ( anxiety trigger!), unwanted pressure etc.... He called my psych and presented the idea but he hasn't gotten back to him and he suggested that when i go see him that i inquire about it as well. The thing is i had an EEG done already, and although it did show one abnormality its signifigance was unclear and from what ive been told doesn't seem like its anything serious. Does anyone here think its a good idea to get a brain scan done, even though ive already had an EEG done? I mean is there still a possibility that this ISN'T psychological.

I also mentioned to him that when i was 5, i hit my head on concrete & was knocked unconscious and that if he thinks that could be playing a role in all of this and he said yes. And i was like well why would it effect me now 13 & 14 years later? He said it could effect you because if any damage was done or anything was disturbed that during my teenage years the brain begins to expand and grow and that while doing that any problem it may have caused, i could be feeling now?

I feel like im back at the drawing board once again, after like 9 months of this shit, i still don't have any definite answers. Im just feeling anxious and depressed right now. I guess im gonna look into getting a brain scan done. The thing i can't understand about there being something physically wrong with me though, is that, if that was the case, like say i had a blood clot, after 9 months wouldn't i be like dead by now??? Actually its been longer than 9 months, Just 9 months of me knowing i have a problem, or if there was any other physical problem, wouldn't i be effected it by it alot more severly?????? I mean shit, i can bench press like 330 pounds and military press near 500, if i had a physical problem, wouldn't i be incapable of doing these things????

things are beginning not to make sense anymore, or maybe once again im over analyzing the situation.

ughh i dunno

 

[Guest]

Ok, i just got back from seeing my therapist, and i guess every once in a while him and about 10 other therapists or so get together and have meetings where they all present a case of one of their clients and give each other insight and advice and opinions etc.... Well at his last meeting he presented my case.

I guess the other therapists presented the idea of that i could have smoked PCP without knowing it and thats why im feeling like this, the whole seizure thing was brought up &they had another idea/suggestion which is that i should look into getting a brain scan done. I asked him what would be the purpose of that and he said that it would be just to make sure their is nothing physically wrong with my brain, such as a lack of blood flow, or clotting ( anxiety trigger!), unwanted pressure etc.... He called my psych and presented the idea but he hasn't gotten back to him and he suggested that when i go see him that i inquire about it as well. The thing is i had an EEG done already, and although it did show one abnormality its signifigance was unclear and from what ive been told doesn't seem like its anything serious. Does anyone here think its a good idea to get a brain scan done, even though ive already had an EEG done? I mean is there still a possibility that this ISN'T psychological.

I also mentioned to him that when i was 5, i hit my head on concrete & was knocked unconscious and that if he thinks that could be playing a role in all of this and he said yes. And i was like well why would it effect me now 13 & 14 years later? He said it could effect you because if any damage was done or anything was disturbed that during my teenage years the brain begins to expand and grow and that while doing that any problem it may have caused, i could be feeling now?

I feel like im back at the drawing board once again, after like 9 months of this shit, i still don't have any definite answers. Im just feeling anxious and depressed right now. I guess im gonna look into getting a brain scan done. The thing i can't understand about there being something physically wrong with me though, is that, if that was the case, like say i had a blood clot, after 9 months wouldn't i be like dead by now??? Actually its been longer than 9 months, Just 9 months of me knowing i have a problem, or if there was any other physical problem, wouldn't i be effected it by it alot more severly?????? I mean shit, i can bench press like 330 pounds and military press near 500, if i had a physical problem, wouldn't i be incapable of doing these things????

things are beginning not to make sense anymore, or maybe once again im over analyzing the situation.

ughh i dunno

 

[Guest]

Also, i really wish that i could find a perfect description of how i feel, so that i could show it to people and they would understand. Even to this day my dad still asks me to describe to him and i really have trouble doing this. The therapist asks me to and i try to give him my best description but its hard for me to describe. I really wish i could have an indepth percise description. But than again i don't even know exactly whats wrong?

 

[Guest]

Also, i really wish that i could find a perfect description of how i feel, so that i could show it to people and they would understand. Even to this day my dad still asks me to describe to him and i really have trouble doing this. The therapist asks me to and i try to give him my best description but its hard for me to describe. I really wish i could have an indepth percise description. But than again i don't even know exactly whats wrong?

 

[JasonFar]

You're just obsessing and the longer you obsess like that the longer you will have to be in this state. Your therapist, or your dad, knowing "how you feel" will solve absolutely nothing; them knowing you feel "like shit" opposed to "unreal and in an alien environment" doesn't make a bit of difference.

I think it's safe to say that whatever the Therapist says or doesn't say, your symptoms are all related to anxiety and depression. He's probably just going along with you with all these "could it be this, could it be that (hit my head when I was 5) because you want such definite answers and the bottom line here is there isn't any.

I think the best thing for you to do is not to get the brain scan, and/or worry about it. Concentrate on getting another job. With a job (crappy or not) and some school on your hands you won't have as much time to fill your head with crap and go in circles.

 

[JasonFar]

You're just obsessing and the longer you obsess like that the longer you will have to be in this state. Your therapist, or your dad, knowing "how you feel" will solve absolutely nothing; them knowing you feel "like shit" opposed to "unreal and in an alien environment" doesn't make a bit of difference.

I think it's safe to say that whatever the Therapist says or doesn't say, your symptoms are all related to anxiety and depression. He's probably just going along with you with all these "could it be this, could it be that (hit my head when I was 5) because you want such definite answers and the bottom line here is there isn't any.

I think the best thing for you to do is not to get the brain scan, and/or worry about it. Concentrate on getting another job. With a job (crappy or not) and some school on your hands you won't have as much time to fill your head with crap and go in circles.

 

[JasonFar]

By the way, I find the image of a bunch of T's around a table, looking at your case.... All dumbfounded one stares blankly in to space............................... PCP? The other T's all look at each other for a second, then are like, "OK, sure." "Yeah, that's a good guess."

Heheh. It's kinda bogus. You would think virtually everyone of them would just say "ANXIETY. SUBSTANCE ABUSE. LIFE TRANSITION."

................................PCP? "Sure, why not?"

:twisted: :lol:

 

[JasonFar]

By the way, I find the image of a bunch of T's around a table, looking at your case.... All dumbfounded one stares blankly in to space............................... PCP? The other T's all look at each other for a second, then are like, "OK, sure." "Yeah, that's a good guess."

Heheh. It's kinda bogus. You would think virtually everyone of them would just say "ANXIETY. SUBSTANCE ABUSE. LIFE TRANSITION."

................................PCP? "Sure, why not?"

:twisted: :lol:

 

[Guest]

^ i know what your saying Jason,but i think he suggested a brain scan to rule out any possibility of any actual physical problems that could be causing this within my brain. I dunno man im no doctor, im just going by what people are telling me and suggesting to me.

 

[Guest]

^ i know what your saying Jason,but i think he suggested a brain scan to rule out any possibility of any actual physical problems that could be causing this within my brain. I dunno man im no doctor, im just going by what people are telling me and suggesting to me.

 

[JAG]

howdy sooooul bro

Dont worry about it. Just get the tests done. Put yourself in your doctor's shoes. A patient comes in with DP/DR symptoms. So you think to yourself he probably has chronic DP. However, you think, I better make sure that I rule out any physical problems.

Many years ago I went to a neurologist because I was getting migraines. The first thing he did was schedule me for a brain scan and EEG. It's common practice. The test itself is nothing to get worried about. It doesn't hurt or anything.

 

[JAG]

howdy sooooul bro

Dont worry about it. Just get the tests done. Put yourself in your doctor's shoes. A patient comes in with DP/DR symptoms. So you think to yourself he probably has chronic DP. However, you think, I better make sure that I rule out any physical problems.

Many years ago I went to a neurologist because I was getting migraines. The first thing he did was schedule me for a brain scan and EEG. It's common practice. The test itself is nothing to get worried about. It doesn't hurt or anything.

 

[peacedove]

I think it should be required that everyone who sees a psychiatrist get a brain scan, PET scan, EEG or whatever done to make sure what the problem is... before they put us all on crazy meds. Just my opinion, then maybe they could know what to give us right off the bat instead of using us as guinea pigs and draining our bank accounts while doing it... "ok so that's not workin for ya here try this one and come back next month and tell me about it...". But anyways, I think it wouldn't hurt to get the tests done. Maybe it'll even make you feel better? If you don't get them done you might spend your whole life wondering about it.

 

[peacedove]

I think it should be required that everyone who sees a psychiatrist get a brain scan, PET scan, EEG or whatever done to make sure what the problem is... before they put us all on crazy meds. Just my opinion, then maybe they could know what to give us right off the bat instead of using us as guinea pigs and draining our bank accounts while doing it... "ok so that's not workin for ya here try this one and come back next month and tell me about it...". But anyways, I think it wouldn't hurt to get the tests done. Maybe it'll even make you feel better? If you don't get them done you might spend your whole life wondering about it.

 

[Dreamer]

OIY! ACH!
Dear Soulbro,
I agree you are driving yourself crazy with obsessing, but I also feel you've got too many cooks in the kitchen.

I feel one should get a full workup with the best psychiatrist one can find. Get as many tests are as deemed necessary. But for example, a GOOD M.D. psychiatrist will be able to tell a psychiatric from a neurological disorder. There have been misdiagnoses where TLE for example was mistaken for a psychiatric disorder or vice versa, but all of this speculating will drive you nuts.

And yeah, it ticks me off that there is a round table discussion by a gang who've never SEEN you or SPOKEN with you. Yes, I understand someone seeking a "second opinion", but if the doctor, is this the psychologist, now I forgot, can't seem to pin something down...

OH THIS REALLY TICKS ME OFF.

I'm not mad at you bro, I'm angry with incompetence and ignorance about DP. If/when I get my act together, I want to speak to medical students, psychiatrists, psychologists (through NAMI work) about DP. I've been VERY lucky with doctors and diagnoses overall. But some of the stories here make me want to scream.

If tests are recommended, yes go for it. If anything for peace of mind. And a proper diagnosis, which at this point... well I can't understand why no one understands DP. I'm still back at the psychologist who coined the new term "Derealment" for you. OH SHOOT US ALL!

Best,
Crabby D :shock:

 

[Dreamer]

OIY! ACH!
Dear Soulbro,
I agree you are driving yourself crazy with obsessing, but I also feel you've got too many cooks in the kitchen.

I feel one should get a full workup with the best psychiatrist one can find. Get as many tests are as deemed necessary. But for example, a GOOD M.D. psychiatrist will be able to tell a psychiatric from a neurological disorder. There have been misdiagnoses where TLE for example was mistaken for a psychiatric disorder or vice versa, but all of this speculating will drive you nuts.

And yeah, it ticks me off that there is a round table discussion by a gang who've never SEEN you or SPOKEN with you. Yes, I understand someone seeking a "second opinion", but if the doctor, is this the psychologist, now I forgot, can't seem to pin something down...

OH THIS REALLY TICKS ME OFF.

I'm not mad at you bro, I'm angry with incompetence and ignorance about DP. If/when I get my act together, I want to speak to medical students, psychiatrists, psychologists (through NAMI work) about DP. I've been VERY lucky with doctors and diagnoses overall. But some of the stories here make me want to scream.

If tests are recommended, yes go for it. If anything for peace of mind. And a proper diagnosis, which at this point... well I can't understand why no one understands DP. I'm still back at the psychologist who coined the new term "Derealment" for you. OH SHOOT US ALL!

Best,
Crabby D :shock:

 

[Guest]

The following is a list of articles (all Psychoanalytic, and I realize not something that will appeal to most folks, I am NOT pushing the psychoanalytic view of DP). My point is this:

Every one of these articles were written between 1937 and 1977. No PCP around then, my dears. And they weren't writing about any brain damage.

DP is very well known within psychoanalytic theories. It is NOT rare. It is NOT new. It is NOT something that is connected to brain damage from drug use.

I only post this to make the point that no matter what ANY idiot doctor tells ANY of you, dp is not "unknown."

Peace,
Janine

Berman, L. (1948). Depersonalization - body ego - genital representation.., Psychoanal. Q., 17:433-452.

Blank, H.R. (1954). Depression, hypomania, and depersonalization., Psychoanal. Q., 23:20-37.

Bonime, W. (1973). Depersonalization as a manifestation of evolving health, J. Amer. Acad. Psychoanal., 1:109-124

Bradlow, P.A. (1973). Depersonalization, ego splitting, non-human fantasy and shame., Int. J. Psychoanal., 54:487-492.

Fast, I., Chethik, M. (1976). Aspects of depersonalization-derealization: child experience.., Int. Rev. Psychoanal., 3:483-490.

Feigenbaum, D. (1937). Depersonalization as a defense mechanism., Psychoanal. Q., 6:4-11.

Frances, A., et al. (1977). Depersonalization: a self-relations perspective., Int. J. Psychoanal., 58:325-332.

Grinberg, L. (1966). Obsessive mechanisms and self-disturbance: depersonalization.., Int. J. Psychoanal., 47:177-183.

Hamilton, J.W. (1975). Depersonalization in the life and writings of Joseph Conrad.., Psychoanal. Q., 44:612-630.

Hunter, R.C.A. (1966). Analysis of episodes of depersonalization in borderline patient.., Int. J. Psychoanal., 47:32-42.

Jacobson, E. (1959). Depersonalization., J. Amer. Psychoanal. Assn., 7:581-610.

Levitan, H.L. (1967). Depersonalization and the dream., Psychoanal. Q., 36:157-171.

Levitan, H.L. (1970). The depersonalization process: sense of reality and unreality.., Psychoanal. Q., 39:449-470.

Lower, R.B. (1971). Depersonalization and the masochistic wish., Psychoanal. Q., 40:584-602.

Lower, R.B. (1972). Affect changes in depersonalization, Psychoanal. Rev., 59:565-577.

Miller, F., Bashkin, E.A. (1974). Depersonalization and self-mutilation., Psychoanal. Q., 43:638-649.

Myers, W.A. (1976). Imaginary companion,fantasy twin,mirror dream;depersonalization.., Psychoanal. Q., 45:503-524.

Oberndorf, C.P. (1934). Depersonalization in relation to erotization of thought., Int. J. Psychoanal., 15:271-295.

Oberndorf, C.P. (1939). On retaining the sense of reality in states of depersonalization., Int. J. Psychoanal., 20:137-147.

Oberndorf, C.P. (1950). The role of anxiety in depersonalization., Int. J. Psychoanal., 31:1-5.

Peto, A. (1955). On so-called 'depersonalization.', Int. J. Psychoanal., 36:379-386.

Renik, O. (1978). The role of attention in depersonalization., Psychoanal. Q., 47:588-605.

Rosenfeld, H. (1947). Analysis of a schizophrenic state with depersonalization., Int. J. Psychoanal., 28:130-139.

Roshco, M. (1967). Perception, denial and depersonalization., J. Amer. Psychoanal. Assn., 15:243-260.

Sarlin, C.N. (1962). Depersonalization and derealization., J. Amer. Psychoanal. Assn., 10:784-804.

Searl, M.N. (1932). A note on depersonalization., Int. J. Psychoanal., 13:329-347.

Shapiro, S.H. (1978). Depersonalization, daydreaming: disturbance sense of reality, Bull. Menninger Clin., 42:307-320.

Stamm, J.L. (1962). Altered ego states allied to depersonalization., J. Amer. Psychoanal. Assn., 10:762-783.

Stewart, W.A., rep. (1964). Panel: Depersonalization., J. Amer. Psychoanal. Assn., 12:171-186.

Stolorow, R.D. (1979). Death anxiety, hypochondriasis, depersonalization: development.., Int. J. Psychoanal., 60:201-214.

Watterson, D.J. (1956). Chlorpromazine, depersonalization, and visual hallucinosis., Bull. Menninger Clin., 20:20-24.

Wittels, F. (1940). Psychology and treatment of depersonalization, Psychoanal. Rev., 27: 57-64.

 

[Guest]

The following is a list of articles (all Psychoanalytic, and I realize not something that will appeal to most folks, I am NOT pushing the psychoanalytic view of DP). My point is this:

Every one of these articles were written between 1937 and 1977. No PCP around then, my dears. And they weren't writing about any brain damage.

DP is very well known within psychoanalytic theories. It is NOT rare. It is NOT new. It is NOT something that is connected to brain damage from drug use.

I only post this to make the point that no matter what ANY idiot doctor tells ANY of you, dp is not "unknown."

Peace,
Janine

Berman, L. (1948). Depersonalization - body ego - genital representation.., Psychoanal. Q., 17:433-452.

Blank, H.R. (1954). Depression, hypomania, and depersonalization., Psychoanal. Q., 23:20-37.

Bonime, W. (1973). Depersonalization as a manifestation of evolving health, J. Amer. Acad. Psychoanal., 1:109-124

Bradlow, P.A. (1973). Depersonalization, ego splitting, non-human fantasy and shame., Int. J. Psychoanal., 54:487-492.

Fast, I., Chethik, M. (1976). Aspects of depersonalization-derealization: child experience.., Int. Rev. Psychoanal., 3:483-490.

Feigenbaum, D. (1937). Depersonalization as a defense mechanism., Psychoanal. Q., 6:4-11.

Frances, A., et al. (1977). Depersonalization: a self-relations perspective., Int. J. Psychoanal., 58:325-332.

Grinberg, L. (1966). Obsessive mechanisms and self-disturbance: depersonalization.., Int. J. Psychoanal., 47:177-183.

Hamilton, J.W. (1975). Depersonalization in the life and writings of Joseph Conrad.., Psychoanal. Q., 44:612-630.

Hunter, R.C.A. (1966). Analysis of episodes of depersonalization in borderline patient.., Int. J. Psychoanal., 47:32-42.

Jacobson, E. (1959). Depersonalization., J. Amer. Psychoanal. Assn., 7:581-610.

Levitan, H.L. (1967). Depersonalization and the dream., Psychoanal. Q., 36:157-171.

Levitan, H.L. (1970). The depersonalization process: sense of reality and unreality.., Psychoanal. Q., 39:449-470.

Lower, R.B. (1971). Depersonalization and the masochistic wish., Psychoanal. Q., 40:584-602.

Lower, R.B. (1972). Affect changes in depersonalization, Psychoanal. Rev., 59:565-577.

Miller, F., Bashkin, E.A. (1974). Depersonalization and self-mutilation., Psychoanal. Q., 43:638-649.

Myers, W.A. (1976). Imaginary companion,fantasy twin,mirror dream;depersonalization.., Psychoanal. Q., 45:503-524.

Oberndorf, C.P. (1934). Depersonalization in relation to erotization of thought., Int. J. Psychoanal., 15:271-295.

Oberndorf, C.P. (1939). On retaining the sense of reality in states of depersonalization., Int. J. Psychoanal., 20:137-147.

Oberndorf, C.P. (1950). The role of anxiety in depersonalization., Int. J. Psychoanal., 31:1-5.

Peto, A. (1955). On so-called 'depersonalization.', Int. J. Psychoanal., 36:379-386.

Renik, O. (1978). The role of attention in depersonalization., Psychoanal. Q., 47:588-605.

Rosenfeld, H. (1947). Analysis of a schizophrenic state with depersonalization., Int. J. Psychoanal., 28:130-139.

Roshco, M. (1967). Perception, denial and depersonalization., J. Amer. Psychoanal. Assn., 15:243-260.

Sarlin, C.N. (1962). Depersonalization and derealization., J. Amer. Psychoanal. Assn., 10:784-804.

Searl, M.N. (1932). A note on depersonalization., Int. J. Psychoanal., 13:329-347.

Shapiro, S.H. (1978). Depersonalization, daydreaming: disturbance sense of reality, Bull. Menninger Clin., 42:307-320.

Stamm, J.L. (1962). Altered ego states allied to depersonalization., J. Amer. Psychoanal. Assn., 10:762-783.

Stewart, W.A., rep. (1964). Panel: Depersonalization., J. Amer. Psychoanal. Assn., 12:171-186.

Stolorow, R.D. (1979). Death anxiety, hypochondriasis, depersonalization: development.., Int. J. Psychoanal., 60:201-214.

Watterson, D.J. (1956). Chlorpromazine, depersonalization, and visual hallucinosis., Bull. Menninger Clin., 20:20-24.

Wittels, F. (1940). Psychology and treatment of depersonalization, Psychoanal. Rev., 27: 57-64.

 

[Guest]

Ironically enough i JUST hit my head while i was at the gym & of course im worrying/obsessing over it right now as i type this.

I was doing this shoulder exercise on this machine, where you bring the bar down past & behind your head to your shoulders. Well right when i was about to start my second set, i brought the bar down and the fuckin thing snapped i feel back and the bar hit me in the back of my head.

Luckily i wasn't knocked out or anything like that. But i was knocked on my ass & stunned. Now i have a little bump on the back of my head, which i did put frozen blueberries in a ziploc bag ( courtesy of my moms suggestion) but that spot on my head still hurts and of course im worrying about all the horrible things that can happen or could have happened and i just feel very weird.

I just find that very ironic, that earlier today people are telling me to get a brain scan and later on in the same day i actually hit my head.

ughh i can't win

Everytime i get a weird sensation im gonna wonder if its the result of getting hit in the head or just anxiety & obsessiveness.

btw, Dreamer, my therapist is NOT my psychiatrist. They are two seperate people.

 

[Guest]

Ironically enough i JUST hit my head while i was at the gym & of course im worrying/obsessing over it right now as i type this.

I was doing this shoulder exercise on this machine, where you bring the bar down past & behind your head to your shoulders. Well right when i was about to start my second set, i brought the bar down and the fuckin thing snapped i feel back and the bar hit me in the back of my head.

Luckily i wasn't knocked out or anything like that. But i was knocked on my ass & stunned. Now i have a little bump on the back of my head, which i did put frozen blueberries in a ziploc bag ( courtesy of my moms suggestion) but that spot on my head still hurts and of course im worrying about all the horrible things that can happen or could have happened and i just feel very weird.

I just find that very ironic, that earlier today people are telling me to get a brain scan and later on in the same day i actually hit my head.

ughh i can't win

Everytime i get a weird sensation im gonna wonder if its the result of getting hit in the head or just anxiety & obsessiveness.

btw, Dreamer, my therapist is NOT my psychiatrist. They are two seperate people.