[Dpersonalizer]

Hello community,

I'm 24, male and have been dealing with permanent dp/dr for almost 6 months now. I've never been officially diagnosed with this, but I have done all the physical tests (blood tests, ct, mri, eeg, eye tests etc.), which all came back negative, so it must be this. My main symptoms are: Permanent feeling as if I'm looking from behind a mirror, everything around me seems unreal, feeling of being lightheaded/dizzy, not able to feel anything (postive or negative feelings). I just consantly feel like I am not really here, but in a film or something. Like I am a robot.

I don't have any explanation what caused this. I was never doing drugs in my whole life. I was just often (almost daily) dealing with panic attacks in the night, when I wanted to sleep. I had problems to breathe and it took me hours to finally get some sleep. I don't know if it has a connection with this. Also I am generally very conscious/careful about me and my body, kinda overwatching it. Besides from that, it was very hard for me to get over a relationship, which is actually over since 2 years now. There could also be a connection with this...

I went to a doctor and he prescribed me Sertralin (Zoloft) and Seroquel, which I took for 2 months, but it didn't really have any effect on me, besides that I could sleep better. So I stopped taking them a month ago.

I remember that, when I was like 14-15, I had a similiar feeling, which was also there permantently and took almost 1 year to disappear, suddenly.

So right now, I don't really know what to do anymore. The feeling is there 24/7 and there is almost no variety of intensitity during the day. Distraction works more or less. That means, I can forget about it for a short time, but anyhow it stays there all the time. Do you think what I have is dp/dr? Do you have any ideas what I could do or some tips? Do you think it will ever go away? Slowly I am really feeling hopeless...

Thanks for reading! (I apologize for any grammar mistakes, I am not a native speaker )

 

[Wendy]

Hey, welcome to the site!

I'm sorry you're going through this, but many people have felt like this before so you're certainly not alone. From what I read of your story, it seems that anxiety has been a big part of your life - that kind of stress can lead to these sort of feelings, especially depersonalization. In that constant state of panic that you seem to have, your body might be overproducing stress hormones. In addition to the physical tests you've done, have you considered doing a saliva test to analyze the cortisol in your body? Cortisol is a very prominent stress hormone and it is possible that an overproduction of it could be the cause. This is something that I'll be testing for very soon myself so it might be something to consider, if you think it might help!

Do you think what I have is dp/dr? Do you have any ideas what I could do or some tips? Do you think it will ever go away? Slowly I am really feeling hopeless...

From what you mention in your post, it does seem like depersonalization.

While the feelings are certainly a big pain, please keep in mind that many people have recovered from this before. As for tips, there are plenty of things that you could try in the managing depersonalization and recovery stories sub-forums! I'm sure you can find some great things in there that may benefit you. As for the things that I've done to recover before:

• Be sure to socialize and interact with others.
• Make sure your diet is good - be positive you're getting all your vitamins and nutrients.
• Exercise whenever you can. It'll release endorphins that will lower stress.

As for my last tip, try to stay positive. I know that can be really difficult in the current circumstances. I know this because I've been through some really tough times with depersonalization and derealization. Just remember, many have recovered before! People that felt just like you do now. You can recover, I believe in you!

Hope this helps.