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Death and Depersonalization

1585 Views 2 Replies 3 Participants Last post by  Recovered
Hey there guys and dolls,

So I was wondering, because it's been on my mind that I sometimes worry about death and dying WITH depersonalization.

Does anyone else have these thoughts, feelings?

I mean, what would it feel like - unreality times 2, when kicking the bucket?

I just don't understand - yes, I understand I'm still young, and have the hopes to get better one day, but I just want some peace of mind know ing when I do kick the bucket, I will know I really did kick the bucket, and not be stuck spiritually between life, and death because I have DP - if that makes any sense whatso ever.

Any insights would be greatly appreciated, small or large.

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I used to have suicidal thoughts when I had DP, but one of the overwhelming driving motivations I had for *not* killing myself was the fact that I had this incessant fear that if I died in DP, I would be 'stuck' in DP world as it were. Perhaps that makes sense to you and is similar to what you are asking. I thought death while depersonalized would leave me trapped for eternity in a bizarre state.

Try not to focus on this too much (fear of death while depersonalized). I figure it's just the mind trying to map out how all the different experiences play out/exist while depersonalized. It looks to the significant things (such as, relationships, occupations, love, death) and tries to comprehend what the unknowable ones would be perceived like. It's like concerning yourself about what your coworkers lunch tasted like: it doesn't really matter ;) The mind convinces you it's important to understand what the phenomenal experience would be like, though :p
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