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One of the most curious things about dp (for me) is the perception of your consciousness. I feel like I'm too aware of my own consciousness, and when I do something, it doesn't feel like I actually consciously decided to do that specific action. I mean, what is consciousness anyway? Couldn't we just be big robots that are piloted by some type of God? That's what I keep freaking out about, what if all the thoughts I'm having are just the byproduct of something/someone else?
OCD and dp is a bad cocktail
 

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What helped me with that was to understand that your awareness is the same as your will. Everything your doing IS you doing it, it just takes a while for you to reconnect to yourself. You can feel you exist, you know you do, and your will and ability to do things is yours. I know what its like. Its awful. It definently feels like your just an automatron, some kind of puppet or something. It gets easier, i had that same exact thing happen to me. I dont even have a problem with it anymore. Im just emotionally disconnected now.
 
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