[Mipmunk]

I have been getting a bit better each day, even though yesterday was a really awful day and I was actually off work. I actually slept last night and am now eating, but I just can't stop thinking/obsessing about "who am I", it seems to be in my head all the time.

Now there is no answer to this question, I was wondering is this still the DP do you think, or have I become obsessed with who I am. I am 35 years old and I know that in the past I haven't been obsessed with who I am, and why should I start now. I seem to be stuck in my head. I keep wanting to take showers and change my clothes to see if it makes me feel different?

Any advice, am I going crazy and torturing myself with this, or is it still DP?

Mip
x :shock:

 

[M A R S]

I feel like this often. It seems like your getting better, but this sounds like some form of anxiety.

 

[1A]

Many times I wake up in the morning thinking I'm Bill Gates; but I'm still broke by the time I get home. (kidding)

On a serious note, yes, I can relate to being obsessed with who I am, why I am here, what is my purpose, why didn't I die from my first panic attack, etc.

1A

 

[Sojourner]

So who are you, Mip? Are you part of the Divine spark?

 

[Mipmunk]

sorry what is divine spark??

Mip
x

 

[Sojourner]

Do you belong to the same family as the rest of us?

 

[Mipmunk]

yes as in DP sufferers, yes.

Saying that I am feeling a lot better again today, only have slightly clammy hands, I feel almost there, starting to feel a lot more like me now.

One thing. Once the final bits of DP go, and I feel fantastic. Will the CBT help me from getting back into DP? It is because of traumas in my life i.e. like when my cat died, major indecisions that eat away at me and make me worry and worry and worry about them, and really bad things in my life that cause the DP to click on.

It just seems in the past that I have had no control of the DP switch clicking into the "on" position.

My therapist giving me CBT says that in the future when something bad happens, I have to try not to get so overwhelmed by the situation or the trauma, and accept that what is happening isn't nice and is horrible, but to not feel like I can't cope and feel overwhelmed, because he thinks that is what causes my DP to click on. It is my self defence protect mechanism which has gone wrong. The trauma passes but the DP switch remains in the "on" position.

Mip
x

 

[Sojourner]

Well, I meant more as the "human family."

With regard to what you wrote, yes, we all have to feel the emotion that we feel when something happens, but then let it go. That's what emotions are FOR. They are the way for us to live and not get stuck in any particular emotional state. We laugh at something funny, and the next minute we can be concentrating on a serious problem. We cry at something that hurts, and maybe we cry for a long time and feel bad about what happened and hurt inside and grieve, but if we feel our feelings fully -- FULLY -- at the appropriate time, then we move on. If your period of grief was for some reason truncated (grief about your cat, I mean), if, for example, some people criticized you for your grief and made you feel bad about how much you cared, then it's possible you never really experienced the grief that was inside you. But let go, we must. Life is a series of lessons of letting go. Ultimately, we have to consciously let go in order to live and then, finally, let go into the arms of eternity.