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Hi there,

I've been struggling a lot with blank mind lately. In the beginning of my DP (earlier this year) I still had the cognitive ability to reflect and have an inner dialogue about the symtoms. Despite of my symtoms I felt a sense of purpose, since I had a meta-state where I was able to connect the dots and obtain knowledge that I felt would support my recovery. Things made sense, and I could easily challenge irrational thoughts with a kind and educated inner voice.

Even though I've had a positive approach to this, stayed away from drugs and made serious efforts to recovery - I'm experiencing my consciousness "shrink" more and more. I no longer feel I have the tools as I previously had and things are becoming more flat.

I have a hard time grasping even the most simple concepts or problem solving. I no longer have the meta-state where I'm able to analyse and reflect on my symtoms. When I start a sentence I barely have an idea of how to end it, and I kind of make it up as I go. And if I ever have an idea, my short term memory is so compromised that I'll probably forget about it while pronouncing the sentence, haha. I have a harder time explaining my symtoms to doctors, and I kind of just read old notes with lists of symtoms I've found in my phone.

The upside is that I never experience negative ruminating, catastrophising or intrusive thoughts. I very rarely experience anxiety. The downside is, well, I am pretty much vegatable (that still is able to write essays about her symtoms. Oh what a preciously complex and irrational state this is)

Do you guys know why my symtoms get worse even though I've tried to have a positive and productive approach?

Or anyone that went through this phase before?


Lots of love
 

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Kinda the same phase right now, but not as bad. Gets better after a while.
I was so blank that I was unable to decide the littlest things, like what to wear to work or how to end an email.

Try to keep yourself busy or get your body moving. When I force myself to be active, feel like it jumpstarts my brain.

All I want is my emotions back. I can think logically and my ability to work is moderately functional, I'm just robot like 24/7
 
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