avoidance makes me feel good...

Uni, dearest...

I only think avoidant behavior is bad if it affects you... I.E., a part of you really doesn't want to avoid. Or, perhaps, you are ashamed of the fact that your behavior is so "avoidant", so "out of line", "unnormal", whatever. But those are all just labels. I personally, for a long while, was ashamed of my avoidant behavior. Still am, to an extent. But, in my heart, I know I'll never yearn for the deeply invigorating events in Life, or at least not at a rapid pace...

I think a lot of us here are avoidants, or at least we simply have different preferences than most... Maybe not. This isn't of course to be confused with a neurosis in which most of us probably also have, keeping us indoors far more than we want or need to be (keeping us from any social interactions; i.e. grocery store)...

But, ideally, I see my Life as always being slow, and with that means semi-avoidant. I will always want a few friends to hang out with, at minimum, but I like you will be happy avoiding things by and large.

So if you don't feel bad, I'd say it's oooootay. If, the next time you run to the market, you have a panic attack... Maybe it's not so ooootay.

Errr, somehow I didn't really get the jist of your post...

You seem to be avoiding things because of fear... I know that all too well.

It's a terrible beast, and cycle. You're eventually going to have to confront it, so it's difficult.

We become accustomed to avoiding the pain and suffering of the experiences that cause us such discomfort, but they are inevitable in leaving a Life on ones own... So you might be happier temporarily, but ultimately you're going to have to do something about the DP/DR/Anxiety that these experiences bring out...

It's tough, I know.

Sorry that probably wasn't as positive.