You are not being selfish at all, you are being honest, we all worry about how we will 'feel' when something bad happens.
For you, you have the added worry of having to deal with it when you are vulnerable. Of course you are concerned.
When the time comes, you will not feel as terrible as you think, we all have inner resources that help us through. Quite often people cope better than they think they will. I've also noticed that people on this website seem to cope remarkably well with more 'tangible' worries. I think because it is dealing within the realm of reality as opposed to something existentialist or a neurotic worry, that it is not, in an odd way, as scary or isolating as something that other people don't understand.
For you, you have the added worry of having to deal with it when you are vulnerable. Of course you are concerned.
When the time comes, you will not feel as terrible as you think, we all have inner resources that help us through. Quite often people cope better than they think they will. I've also noticed that people on this website seem to cope remarkably well with more 'tangible' worries. I think because it is dealing within the realm of reality as opposed to something existentialist or a neurotic worry, that it is not, in an odd way, as scary or isolating as something that other people don't understand.
