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Anybody Sabatoged by feeling Fraudulent?

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One of the most aggravating things that my head tells me is that "I'm not really making it". Seems to get louder when I have the gall to start feeling I might be Ok. In 1968 This song by Simon and Garfunkel came out. I was 12 going on 13 and I didn't understand it all, but I loved the tune and related even then. Here's some lyrics:
I'm such a dubious soul

And a walk in the garden...

Wears me down.

Tangled in the fallen vines,

Pickin' up the punch lines..

I know I'm Fakin It.

Not really makin' it.

Is there any danger?

No, no, not really.

Just lean on me.

Takin' time to treat your friendly neighbors honestly..

I've just been Fakin It

Not really makin' it.

This feeling of Fakin It,

I Still haven't shaken it.
Anyway, I'm going to try to find some music that helps me somehow.
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Ill repost this:

I started to feel my self acting a tiny bit more normal tonight, and frankly that terrifies me.

Maybe its the buspar Finley starting to work, or maybe its bi-polar disorder.

I feel normal and then freak out that that's wrong and its part of some mental illness i must have. Then i think if i start to get better what happens it this is all fake and I'm really just so much worse now.

Has anyone else ever had feelings like this?
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