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Hello. Im new here, and i would like to tell you my symptoms, how this all started and ask for some help. Sorry for bad English, its not my main language and also I have a blank mind so its hard to get my "thoughts" together.. I never really had any trauma in my life altough i was always a bit anxious and have a tendency to overthink things.
I already felt something was off from around 2016 June, i would get dizzy in work, have minor headaches, started to have anxiety and hipochondria.
After this in 2017 January i had a panick attack on weed, it lasted for about an hour but then it went away, and i felt mostly normal for the next week. But then something weird happened, i was in my room and suddenly started panicking again and felt very strong fear, accompanied with weird headaches. I was thinking that i have brain cancer or anything bad with my head. This panic went on for about 2 weeks, after that i saw a neurologist/psychatric who told me there is nothing wrong phisically. Also had a brain MRI to rule out any problems. This still wasnt enough i got even more panicked because the symptoms didnt wanted to pass. I was having insomnia I started feeling spaced out, my memory started to get impaired, i started to get emotionanlly numb, my mind was getting sort of blank, maybe from the anxiety, so the blank mind for me wasnt instant, it felt like it was slowly deteriorating but the weird thing is that i experienced that exercise, and socialising a lot helped my mind come back, it got better already a few times for a day or two and when i felt better it was kind of like the world opened up again, everything started to have meaning, really like waking up from a dream but it never lasted long and i went back to this state.
Meds: i took zoloft with seroquel(for sleep) but all it did is numbing me even more so i stopped. Now im taking Mirtazapine for about 5 months because it helps with sleep.
My symptoms are same still the same, even worse than it was, the blank mind is really bad, the worst, but i still feel like im thinking but its only in the back of my head, cant hear my thoughts, my memory is like i have dementia, total emotional numbness, and disconnection. Also im having a half year off school, i dont work or do much nowdays mainly play computer games or watch movies because if i start working or to hard task the head pressure gets 10 times worse and i get so disorientated. At home i feel fairly Ok, but i guess staying in my room is only making things worse. I still try to see my friends as many times as i can and i also have a girlfriend but when im with them i fake everything, i feel like i even fake take that i have a life and am alive. Looking back on last year it feels like its unreal didnt even happen. Also i dont exercise anymore because i smoke a lot. I dont really know what should i do, everything seems so pointless like this, maybe i can force myself back to working part time or to go out more but the head pressure and the blank mind makes it really hard.
Anyone have some advice on what should i be doing?
Thanks for reading.
 
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