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G

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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi,

I just wanted some support today, as I feel so down. I wonder how DP people can work (it's my obsession) in a office, without trouble. I know I can't wait for me to heal until I go work, but I wonder how will I tought this ice wall, this strangeness, this feeling I am going crazy, thi 2 d vision, this tiredness at work! The worst is very very DR... I just feel sometimes like I am walking alone and reality is just besides me. Like I always say, it's worse when I enter and go out a place.

I know reassurance is not the answer, but sometimes it helps me have hope, you understand? I want so much my mind to be clear, my ideas to be clear, sometimes I just don't know what helps and what make things worse. It's been 14 months since I have this, and I KNOW many people have this for longer periods of time than me, but sorry, I have big trouble to tought that.

I will try to relax today, but I feel my life is going nowhere. I hate depression.

Thanks for be there.

Cyn xxx
 
G

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Discussion Starter · #2 ·
Hi,

I just wanted some support today, as I feel so down. I wonder how DP people can work (it's my obsession) in a office, without trouble. I know I can't wait for me to heal until I go work, but I wonder how will I tought this ice wall, this strangeness, this feeling I am going crazy, thi 2 d vision, this tiredness at work! The worst is very very DR... I just feel sometimes like I am walking alone and reality is just besides me. Like I always say, it's worse when I enter and go out a place.

I know reassurance is not the answer, but sometimes it helps me have hope, you understand? I want so much my mind to be clear, my ideas to be clear, sometimes I just don't know what helps and what make things worse. It's been 14 months since I have this, and I KNOW many people have this for longer periods of time than me, but sorry, I have big trouble to tought that.

I will try to relax today, but I feel my life is going nowhere. I hate depression.

Thanks for be there.

Cyn xxx
 

· Registered
Joined
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544 Posts
coucouc said:
Hi,

I just wanted some support today, as I feel so down. I wonder how DP people can work (it's my obsession) in a office, without trouble. I know I can't wait for me to heal until I go work, but I wonder how will I tought this ice wall, this strangeness, this feeling I am going crazy, thi 2 d vision, this tiredness at work! The worst is very very DR... I just feel sometimes like I am walking alone and reality is just besides me. Like I always say, it's worse when I enter and go out a place.

I know reassurance is not the answer, but sometimes it helps me have hope, you understand? I want so much my mind to be clear, my ideas to be clear, sometimes I just don't know what helps and what make things worse. It's been 14 months since I have this, and I KNOW many people have this for longer periods of time than me, but sorry, I have big trouble to tought that.

I will try to relax today, but I feel my life is going nowhere. I hate depression.

Thanks for be there.

Cyn xxx
*hugs*

i feel exactly the same way...

i feel like i cannot cope anymore...

i wish the thoughts of "i feel unreal" and "nothing is real" never came into my head!

but i know that one day my mind will be clear...our minds will be clear...we will all struggle...cope and heal....it is just the waiting that is hard.

it does not matter whether you have had this 5 minutes or 5 years...the experience is frightening and so when the feelings come just do what you can....

take care....

PM me anytime :)
 

· Registered
Joined
·
544 Posts
coucouc said:
Hi,

I just wanted some support today, as I feel so down. I wonder how DP people can work (it's my obsession) in a office, without trouble. I know I can't wait for me to heal until I go work, but I wonder how will I tought this ice wall, this strangeness, this feeling I am going crazy, thi 2 d vision, this tiredness at work! The worst is very very DR... I just feel sometimes like I am walking alone and reality is just besides me. Like I always say, it's worse when I enter and go out a place.

I know reassurance is not the answer, but sometimes it helps me have hope, you understand? I want so much my mind to be clear, my ideas to be clear, sometimes I just don't know what helps and what make things worse. It's been 14 months since I have this, and I KNOW many people have this for longer periods of time than me, but sorry, I have big trouble to tought that.

I will try to relax today, but I feel my life is going nowhere. I hate depression.

Thanks for be there.

Cyn xxx
*hugs*

i feel exactly the same way...

i feel like i cannot cope anymore...

i wish the thoughts of "i feel unreal" and "nothing is real" never came into my head!

but i know that one day my mind will be clear...our minds will be clear...we will all struggle...cope and heal....it is just the waiting that is hard.

it does not matter whether you have had this 5 minutes or 5 years...the experience is frightening and so when the feelings come just do what you can....

take care....

PM me anytime :)
 
G

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
I took the entire month of August off from work. Never had such a long break before. I wanted to see if it was work causing me to think the DP is becoming worse. Turns out that if anything, the opposite is true.
I became sooooo anxious and DP'ed without the daily structure provided by a job.
Yes, it is difficult to have a job and be DP/DR. I find myself needing to move around often, go outside for little breaks, etc. But for those of you that don't work - I don't know how you manage.
 
G

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
I took the entire month of August off from work. Never had such a long break before. I wanted to see if it was work causing me to think the DP is becoming worse. Turns out that if anything, the opposite is true.
I became sooooo anxious and DP'ed without the daily structure provided by a job.
Yes, it is difficult to have a job and be DP/DR. I find myself needing to move around often, go outside for little breaks, etc. But for those of you that don't work - I don't know how you manage.
 
G

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Thanks,

I don't know how I do, but I have to find a job (interview), etc. I feel I will be so confused they will fire me (it may be not true). And I think I will become so depressed to feel this way and work, that I will be even more depressed. Now, I can "think" I am "ill" and when I'll be"better" I'll go to work. I can imagine to feel 100 % and go to work. I know it's not true.

I tried today to change benzo, it made things worse.

I feel like crap. I wished to work and not have DR. It's the worse ever....

What helps you with DR???

Cyn xxx
 
G

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Thanks,

I don't know how I do, but I have to find a job (interview), etc. I feel I will be so confused they will fire me (it may be not true). And I think I will become so depressed to feel this way and work, that I will be even more depressed. Now, I can "think" I am "ill" and when I'll be"better" I'll go to work. I can imagine to feel 100 % and go to work. I know it's not true.

I tried today to change benzo, it made things worse.

I feel like crap. I wished to work and not have DR. It's the worse ever....

What helps you with DR???

Cyn xxx
 
G

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
I want so much this crap to go away!

I want to believe I will be OK one day. Just 100 % okay.

Sorry, I feel very sad today. Must be the new med. Maybe. :cry:

Cyn xxx
 
G

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
I want so much this crap to go away!

I want to believe I will be OK one day. Just 100 % okay.

Sorry, I feel very sad today. Must be the new med. Maybe. :cry:

Cyn xxx
 

· Former Moderator
Joined
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1,084 Posts
It isn't the "job", per se, that suppresses one's dp...it's the structure of the day...the occupying of one's mental faculties so they don't wander off alone and cause mischief. I'm sure you all know this, but i just wanted to qualify it.

I'm not sure the idea of keeping oneself occupied with tedious tasks all day (unless you're lucky enough to have a joy that you legitimately enjoy) is exactly what we should strive for. It's a life where we are enjoying and involved in every moment of every day.

sc, i would be interested to know what your daily schedule was like when you took your vacation. i find that if i can plan to do things that i either enjoy (sailing) or that simply need doing (the laundry), the dp is mostly kept at bay. It's when i'm lounging around...pittering away watching mediocre tv shows or involved in some other banal venture...that's when the dp brandishes it's mighty fangs.

s.
 

· Former Moderator
Joined
·
1,084 Posts
It isn't the "job", per se, that suppresses one's dp...it's the structure of the day...the occupying of one's mental faculties so they don't wander off alone and cause mischief. I'm sure you all know this, but i just wanted to qualify it.

I'm not sure the idea of keeping oneself occupied with tedious tasks all day (unless you're lucky enough to have a joy that you legitimately enjoy) is exactly what we should strive for. It's a life where we are enjoying and involved in every moment of every day.

sc, i would be interested to know what your daily schedule was like when you took your vacation. i find that if i can plan to do things that i either enjoy (sailing) or that simply need doing (the laundry), the dp is mostly kept at bay. It's when i'm lounging around...pittering away watching mediocre tv shows or involved in some other banal venture...that's when the dp brandishes it's mighty fangs.

s.
 
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