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Always lonely regardless of people

1043 Views 9 Replies 3 Participants Last post by  gem
Anyone else get this? Like, you always feel alone despite being surrounded by people. It happens to me constantly regardless of who im with (family, friends, girlfriends, etc). I just cant seem to shake the feeling and it leads me down this reclusive looking path of drug use and video games because anything is better than always being aware that you're gonna

a.) Die


b.) Never gonna relate to anyone.

Its seriously limiting me.. and pushing my expectations of life right into the sewer. All this morose stupidty has me always looking to humanity to undersand what makes them so happy, and i observe them.. and want to be one of them, but regardless of how many friends i make its always so fucking god damned fake, like a human sniffing a dogs ass. Its just out of place for me. I'm honestly considering just buying a van and moving back to cali to live on the beach just so as to be happy enough to drown out my own misery with an ocean large enough to drown any beast. The funny thing is that im sure a good number of people would kill for my life and i can't even appreciate it. Irony eh?

i dunno.

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Yes I know exactly what you mean - no matter who you are with or what you are doing you still can't shake the feeling of being alone. Its really bad when you are doing something that's supposed to be fun and you suddenly realise you are analysing every second of it - "Am I having fun? Do I want to be here? Why can't I feel connected like all these people can?" and so on.
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