I guess you can think of it like this.
You have to take a sh1t in the toilet. There's a .04% chance that a ghoulie will come up out of the toilet and chomp on your asshole. There's a good chance you won't see the bugger.
The other option, therefore, would be to go take a sh1t in the forrest. There's nothing potentially dangering about that, except perhaps for a crow to sh1t on your sh1tting self. But ultimately, going with modern technology's fabuloso intvention of the toilet is going to be quicker, more efficient, and many other things.
I'm in the forrest somewhere squatting like a chimp.
I think I win for the utterly worst metaphor ever.