[jc]

does anyone here ever get that feeling that at times anything external still doesnt drag your awareness away from yourself..
now im sure this is just a fleeting thought(well with me it is) but sometimes i can be surrounded by the television,books,computer and i suddenly feel as though these distractions still arnt enough to pull my awareness outwards and i find myself sinking inwards and even to this day it still scares the crap out of me...i can only compare it to being in a cell with no windows or doors,just me myself and my mind,scary as hell yet it still wont go away,its a constant battle

just venting

 

[dreamcatcher]

I FIND I AM LIKE THAT TOO. NO AMOUNT OF DISTRACTION PULLS ME OUT OF IT.....I AM ALWAYS AWARE THAT I AM LIVING IN MY HEAD....AND SINKING DEEPER......ITS HELL

 

[jc]

oh it will get better,with me it used to be constant but now i get it if ive been ill or havnt slept well,i just tell myself now that 'it wont last forever' but its still a head rush that scares me,i think we all get this now and again its such a strange sensation and the hardest part is feeling this when you are with friends as you have to still behave as though nothings wrong

 

[bat]

hi jc

haven't seen you on the site much recently; glad you're getting out into your life. seems like you're getting therapy, meeting up with friends. i think it's really positive to read your posts; to see that you're only getting flashes of dp and that you're getting on with things. i'm getting there myself. any news on the housing front?

 

[jc]

hi pdr
im still on the housing waiting list but moving up the ladder slowly,im getting out and about but im still living in this weird little world of mine..i still enjoy the odd drink but ive cut it back alot,i was just honest with myself and realised that i actually enjoy sitting with friends in the pub having a few pints so therefore im going to do it...but the money front is a bit dry which today of all days im fed up about as they have a game on down the pub today

manchester united v manchester city

and i hate the thought of everyone having fun and me being stuck indoors....so having said that i guess although im still a ball of anxiety and confusion im getting on with things

 

[bat]

surely you don't support man u!

 

[jc]

i dont support either of these teams but a local derby is always a good atmosphere