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a short story about going out and using alcohol to calm down

727 Views 4 Replies 4 Participants Last post by  Isobel
so yesterday in my quest to start getting out of the house and living again my dad asks if i want to go out for an indian meal...usually my quick fire response would be no thanks ! as his favourite restaurant is about 5 miles im ok cycling this distance but being in a car with my dad driving 5 miles feels like a nightmare...too much time to sit and introspect...but i said yes! lets go for it,my mind said 'this fuckers not gonna beat me'
i took a benzo,got in the car felt anxious and unreal took another benzo,my palms were sweating and i couldnt feel my body,i knew this was anxiety and kept telling myself this,we eventually got to the restaurant and my dad said to the owner 'table for two please' i said 'look dad can we get a takeaway' he said sure...the waiter then asked if we want a drink,i ordered a pint of lager...i drank my lager and boom !
'dad sure lets eat at the table' and after the meal i was calm as can be,we drove home i was calm laughing and actually enjoying the time id spent with my dad as we never go out together...and all this after one beer.....
why cant they turn a pint of carlsberg into tablet form ? these benzos dont do anything for me
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JC mate, I doubt if one beer is going to 'chemically' calm you down. It sounds suspiciously like your anxiety lessened once you had a beer in your hand.....a crutch if you like. I'm the same with benzo's...alcohol doesn't calm me down, but if I know I've got a 2mg diazepam in my pocket then the panic subsides...even though 2mg does nothing for me. It's easy for us to justify the use of any kind of anti-anxiety agent, be it beer or benzo's, if we think they will help stave off an impending crisis.

As for the benzo's, well, as far as I can remember you've been on the same dose regularly for a number of years, so it's no wonder it's not doing you any good. I'm not saying up the dose, just pointing out what you know already.
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