I came here to tell you tips that helped me, if you don't like it, click away. I have already regretted it.
A bit of very important tip to all of you - I'm 70% out of DP.
Dear everyone,
I will be short, working on my next music video.
So, my DP hit in 2010, through a panic attack during a hot day, during a hangover. I always knew I come from a dysfunctional family, but, and first tip comes:
Gábor
I will be short, working on my next music video.
So, my DP hit in 2010, through a panic attack during a hot day, during a hangover. I always knew I come from a dysfunctional family, but, and first tip comes:
- when you been emotionally neglected in your childhood, you don't know it. This is ABSOLUTELY important. You have no reference. So if you have DP, just trust me or anyone who says it, and go on
- when you been emotionally abused in your childhood, you don't know it. That's it. Crucial to get. NO abusive parent ever said: "Look, son / daughter, you are a little lazy ugly evil bastard! You aren't worth shit! BUT, know that I am a pretty bad abusive narcissistic parent and you shouldn't take me seriously!" NO. They just tell you the first part, and you probably believe it, even if not fully.
- MILESTONES. This is what I learned from Harris Harrington's program AND his free videos. EXTREME importance. In a normal household, it is like, you get your first girl (as a man), your parents tell you "Wow, congrats! You're starting to be a man!", when you get your first good grade in XY, they tell you "Wow! How good you are in this! I was not this good when I was a kid!". Of course, a narcissistic parent will never say that, but even a normal, loving mother who was ALSO neglected in childhood will have a hard time praising you in ways and in amount she never ever received. Or, "Now you are a man!" or "Now you are a real entrepreneur!" or "Now you are a real artist! You have fans!"
If you never got these "milestone responses" in your childhood, you will not give them to yourself if you never resolved this, and you can LITERALLY achieve all of your dreams, be a 7 times world champion in 4 sports, you'll STILL feel worthless! Of course, MENTALLY you will know it, but you'll still feel like a nobody. This is the cause of unhealthy perfectionism, which I'm sure most of people with DP has.
Gábor
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This is really serious stuff. But really it wasn't an excuse and I wasn't trying to prove something by asking that question. I just think it is a much healthier way to do things, if you are the one at the initiative of talking about personal stuff, it is much healthier to talk about your own than to go into other people's buisnesses.Wonder what's your next excuse will be.
I was 3 year old when I caught my mother cheating on my father, they started fighting when I told my father, they divorced after.
I was 4 when my narcissistic father robbed me from my mother's place during Christmas.
After that I lived one week at my father one week at my mother's place for 20 years.
Daddy is an alcoholic narcissist. I brought home 5 grades, 4 of them A, one B, weekend was spent me being scolded for the B, and he was constantly asking what grade XY classmate got for the same exam.
At mother's place, stepfather was beating her for 18 years, every now and then. My mother sometimes had to wear sunglasses everywhere she went because of the black eye.
Due to the constant fights and neglect of children, my little brother died in a home accident when I was 7 years old.
When I was 17 after a serious surgery, with an urinating bag on my side, my father hit me drunk, I could have died.
Other than that, I was a pretty good student always, won coding and Math competitions, started making music at 14 which I still do.
Yes, and I am giving you tips too. So now you see what it feels like when others tell you point blank the "truth" about yourself. It doesn't feel good. It's not cool to tell someone they are in denial and you know them better than they know themselves. Even if you didn't do it with bad intentions.I'm not your fucking therapist, I came here to tell you tips that helped me, if you don't like it, click away. I have already regretted it.
We're not too big on antisocial behavior here anymore, Thyrsta. You're just being plain awful.
I really am good at getting people riled up at me for no reason. First I disagree with what they have to say and the next thing I know it isn’t a friendly conversation anymore. I don’t actually like or enjoy being toxic back. I just feel like it’s well-deserved when I do.
With that being said I have been a dick to trith in the past (which I’ve been forgiven for) (multiple times). But when I come to the DP forum now I look forward to seeing what NoDevils, Trith and Leminsaeri have to say.
Perhaps we got off on the wrong foot Thsyta. I don’t actually think you have nothing to contribute here. But you weren’t very nice to me sir.
With that being said I have been a dick to trith in the past (which I’ve been forgiven for) (multiple times). But when I come to the DP forum now I look forward to seeing what NoDevils, Trith and Leminsaeri have to say.
Perhaps we got off on the wrong foot Thsyta. I don’t actually think you have nothing to contribute here. But you weren’t very nice to me sir.
For the part that is about me, don't worry about it, this happens to me too and I'm quite sure it will happen to me again in the future. But like you I also enjoy reading everyone here. Most interactions here make me reflect on myself and learn something new, regardless of if those interactions seem conflictual. Also, more and more often, whenever someone says something that I disagree with, even if it is triggering me, I tend to keep some part of the message and realize there is some truth to it and I take more time to digest it (and maybe find even more truth).I really am good at getting people riled up at me for no reason. First I disagree with what they have to say and the next thing I know it isn’t a friendly conversation anymore. I don’t actually like or enjoy being toxic back. I just feel like it’s well-deserved when I do.
With that being said I have been a dick to trith in the past (which I’ve been forgiven for) (multiple times). But when I come to the DP forum now I look forward to seeing what NoDevils, Trith and Leminsaeri have to say.
Perhaps we got off on the wrong foot Thsyta. I don’t actually think you have nothing to contribute here. But you weren’t very nice to me sir.
Trigger is not cause.Everyone's triggers are different.
41 - 47 of 47 Posts
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