It was a warm day in December 1971 for me. I was 17. I also had a cannabis trauma. It significantly changed my self perception and perception of my environment. I lost my emotions and fell into a deep depression which featured heavy anxiety and insomnia.
I began to experience ocular migraines and still do. I suffered frequent spells which caused panic. I spoke to a neurologist about my ocular migraine hallucinations. He told me that Neurology in the US had "bigger fish to fry.", but that the British had conducted
more research in that subject. Decades later, his comment would lead me to solve the riddle of my mental illness. I worked with my symptoms, but never accepted that somehow cannabis had made me mentally ill. I researched the internet and googled and googled.
Somehow, I found myself reading British neurological texts and medical journals. It was there I found a case history that explained everything. 50% of people who require surgery to stop refractory epileptic seizures have their temporal lobe seizures begin with a lesser
seizure known as an abdominal aura or epigastric aura. It starts with pain and a rising sensation from the bottom of the Vagus nerve in the abdomen, and rises through the chest into the brain. I recognized those uniquely odd symptoms as those I had experienced at 17.
Shortly thereafter, the temporal lobe seizure begins. I then realized I had experienced about 30 epileptic discharges on intervals of 5 seconds each. With each discharge, I had something called "dolly zoom" hallucination, where whatever I was focused on zoomed away and became very small as if at the far end of a long tunnel.
According to the neurological text, the worse case scenario is when the post ictal psychosis segues into an affective disorder of major depression, or bipolar disorder. That was me. By my mid 50s, I had survived 4 epic struggles with depression featuring insomnia and anxiety.
As a result of my revelation, I received two EEGs which showed significant pathology in my temporal lobe, consistent with a history of seizure. I now know my panic attacks were focal temporal lobe seizures. I had ECT about 6 years ago and it worked wonders.
I used to take Effexor. Now I take escitalopram. I'm not sure I even need it anymore, but it gives me no side effects and makes my VA psychiatrist happy. All my symptoms have been relieved except for the occasional ocular. Life is good. Congratulations on
your survival.
I began to experience ocular migraines and still do. I suffered frequent spells which caused panic. I spoke to a neurologist about my ocular migraine hallucinations. He told me that Neurology in the US had "bigger fish to fry.", but that the British had conducted
more research in that subject. Decades later, his comment would lead me to solve the riddle of my mental illness. I worked with my symptoms, but never accepted that somehow cannabis had made me mentally ill. I researched the internet and googled and googled.
Somehow, I found myself reading British neurological texts and medical journals. It was there I found a case history that explained everything. 50% of people who require surgery to stop refractory epileptic seizures have their temporal lobe seizures begin with a lesser
seizure known as an abdominal aura or epigastric aura. It starts with pain and a rising sensation from the bottom of the Vagus nerve in the abdomen, and rises through the chest into the brain. I recognized those uniquely odd symptoms as those I had experienced at 17.
Shortly thereafter, the temporal lobe seizure begins. I then realized I had experienced about 30 epileptic discharges on intervals of 5 seconds each. With each discharge, I had something called "dolly zoom" hallucination, where whatever I was focused on zoomed away and became very small as if at the far end of a long tunnel.
According to the neurological text, the worse case scenario is when the post ictal psychosis segues into an affective disorder of major depression, or bipolar disorder. That was me. By my mid 50s, I had survived 4 epic struggles with depression featuring insomnia and anxiety.
As a result of my revelation, I received two EEGs which showed significant pathology in my temporal lobe, consistent with a history of seizure. I now know my panic attacks were focal temporal lobe seizures. I had ECT about 6 years ago and it worked wonders.
I used to take Effexor. Now I take escitalopram. I'm not sure I even need it anymore, but it gives me no side effects and makes my VA psychiatrist happy. All my symptoms have been relieved except for the occasional ocular. Life is good. Congratulations on
your survival.
