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little star

Member Since 28 Jun 2013
Offline Last Active Aug 27 2020 02:23 PM

#351087 How can you 'not think about dp' after 10 years dp ???

Posted by little star on 04 April 2015 - 06:40 PM

Hi everyone,



I have read on this forum that you must trying not to think about dp. But how can I distract myself after 10 years dp ???

When I distract myself, I think that I am not thinking about dp, but I still have dp... thus I think about dp ???


How can I exercise myself not to think about dp ??? I don't know how to do this after 10 years dp.





Thank you.




Greetings from the Netherlands,


Little star.

#351023 I don't know it any more, after 10 years dp/dr.

Posted by little star on 02 April 2015 - 07:12 PM

Hey AylaStar,




Sorry, I am a little bit late (again...) with my response.


But thank you so much for your detailed explanation :wub:  :)  !!!

I am very happy to read this !!!



Did you see this topic is "HOT" , there are 571 views at this topic... (see start-page) .  Wooowwww...



But back to your explanation.

The first way to do it, that first 5 pounds is really believing in the possibility that we WILL recover. That is our foundation. Without a solid foundation even the biggest building will fail, so we have to really throw in whatever faith or hope we can muster (and it's hard) into understanding in our soul that WE CAN RECOVER. And we can!

Thank you for your pep talk !!!


have to get sick and tired of being sick and tired

So, I always feel like this... :( ...


I understand your explanation. For me, I also try to leave the house every day. For example, to go to the supermarket. But it isn't easy. Sometimes I don't want to leave the house, because I am afraid of the dp. But I also have, that when I am with other people, I am a little bit nervous... (social anxiety...)


  "all you have to do is change your thinking...." I was pissed. IF I could do that I wouldn't be in this mess!!!!

Soooo, I am thinking the same, at this moment. I know that I must change my thinking, but I don't know how ???

Trying not think about it... yeah... after 10 (or in your situation, 20) years... That isn't so easy... And it is difficult to think positive when you have this *&&^#$%@#  disorder... It is sooooo hard...


BUT, we are NOT brain dead. Despite how strange and alien and gone we feel, we do know there is a little part of US still here.

It is strange, isn't it ? We have the feeling that we doesn't live, but we still have memories...


I don't know about you, but I have ruminating thoughts at times that drive me nuts.

This isn't also strange for me... I understand what you mean. Dp is like a song that can't get out of your head... It goes on and on...


At first I would distract myself and try and push the fear away but then I would think, "why am I doing this thing, oh yeah to distract myself from this." and then it would hit me again.

Oooohhh yeah.... It sounds the way I am thinking at this moment... hihi.


I heard that the way what we are thinking, becomes our normal (the dp becomes our normal) . A little bit strange, but I know we are in a negative circle.


For me: I feel myself a little bit unsure, when I am with other people. I think that I have social anxiety. But when I feel the anxiety, I still have dp... (huh??? ...)


We can't go back to normal if we're trying to control the not-normal.

Like the comparison with 'not thinking about the purple elephant... ;)  .


I learned a lot of your explanation, thanks !!!




Greetings !!!

#350523 I don't know it any more, after 10 years dp/dr.

Posted by little star on 19 March 2015 - 07:07 PM

Hey WillWin,




Thanks a lot for your message. It feels good to 'talk' (write things down) here, to feel not alone with this stupid disorder.


I too have the whole time perception issue

It is a scary thing, isn't it ? It feels so crazy, like you are not alive... :wacko: , like you are not here on earth...


and share a lot of the same symptoms you've described. 

Ah, oke. But that is not so funny, hey. But that means that you will understand me what I feel.

On this moment I am so looking for a solution for this kind of shit (sorry for the word). I don't know how to practice myself not to think about it ?

And how can I accept this ? They say that you first must accept it, before you can recover... fine... :wacko: .


What I suggest is to use this site as a tool.

Yes, here on this forum is a lot of information about this disorder.


For me, I didn't know what I had. For around 20 years I have suffered on and off, sometimes intensely, sometimes functioning. It wasn't until I had this last episode of intense panic that I was willing to do some research.

Oooo, my god, 20 years ! That's a long time. And you didn't know what you have...

I must say, I have the same story. So, I live 10 years with dp/dr and for me that's also a long time. So, I can not imagine that I have to live another 10 years with dp/dr :unsure: . But after 10 years a psychologist explains me what I have. After 10 years !!!


  It made me feel like I wasn't alone.

Yes, it is. It feels 'good' to read you can recover.


debilitating experiences I started focusing on the recovery stories. I highly recommend it.

Ooooo, I read the wrong stories here :P , I forgot the recovery stories, hihi. Maybe it is better to read the recovery stories after 10 years dp/dr...

But do you know how you can recover ? I don't know how I can do it... ???


It's hard to think that after suffering from something so long there actually could be an end in sight. 

Yes, it is soooo true what you say.  It is sooooo difficult for me to think positive... :wacko: .


But there is! Try to find some optimism.

I really hope so !!! And I think I must learn to think positive, but that is easy to say.


It sounds like you're on the right track. 

Thanks !!! But I have to research here on the forum how I can recover...

Jeee, not think about it... so that is not so easy after 10 years chronic dp/dr :wacko: .

The dp is sooooo scary feeling, I think I have to learn not to be afraid of the unreal feeling... So.... that is difficult :wacko: .


Let me know if you need anything. :) 

Thanks a lot :wub:  !!!!!!!



I think the most difficult things for me are the following:

1.   Not to be afraid of the unreal feeling. For me it is so difficult to stay busy, when I have this unreal feeling. Sometimes I want to stay in my bed, because of the unreal feeling... But I know that is not so good thing.

2.   Not to think about the unreal feeling. Is it possible after 10 years ? And for you 20 years... That must be heavy for you... :wacko: .

3.   Not to be afraid when I am with other people. Sometimes I am a little bit unsure...

4.   Accept it... How can I accept it ??? Must you accept the unreal feeling or 'the cause of the dp/dr' ???




Thanks !!!



Greetings from the Netherlands.

#350424 Hello, everyone..

Posted by little star on 16 March 2015 - 07:32 PM

Hey 'ThoughtOnFire' ,



Selig, one of the site owners, says DP/DR is a "State specific memory". As in, when you have it, you know what it's like. When you don't have it, you don't know what it's like.

So, this is really strange...


Oké ???




Greetings !

#350347 I don't know it any more, after 10 years dp/dr.

Posted by little star on 14 March 2015 - 07:25 PM

Hello everybody,



So, let me introduce myself. I'm a 36 years old lady (born in 1979) from the Netherlands. I hope my English is good to read ;) .


Let me tell my story. I hope it is not to long.


In my childhood I have social anxiety, but I don't know why... I have anxiety to go to the café (the bar), etc.

In 2004 I get dp/dr and it became chronic. In the period 2004-2008 I am going to different psychologists for CBT and I get a lot of pills. Pills like anti-depressants, anti-psychotics and pills like xanax.

But it all doesn't work  :(  . Then in 2008 all the psychologists told me that they couldn't help me any more :( . 


Then in 2008 I was going back to my doctor and he told me I have a B12 deficiency. So in 2008 I get B12 injections, but it doesn't work :( .


From 2008-2012 I get no therapie, because I was thinking it was the B12.


In 2012 I was going to a psychologist and he told me I have Asperger (ASS) and my social anxiety comes from the Asperger diagnose.

So after 10 years this psychologist told me what I have and he was right. But this psychologist cannot help me any more, strange...


So this is what I have, a summary:

Asperger --> a lot of isolation of myself, because of social anxiety. -->  In 2004 chronic dp/dr, because the isolation is a kind of 'trauma' for me. --> I get depressed of the dp/dr feelings --> Now it is 2015 and I still have chronic dp/dr...

So, now I have find this forum and I need some help. I am afraid that the dp/dr will not go away. I don't know what I have to do, to recover from this stupid disorder.


My psychologist say to me: 'You must not think about it..'

How can I not think about it, after 10 years dp/dr ???


I read on this forum that you must accept this... But how can I accept this stupid feelings... :wacko:  :( ???


I don't know it any more :( . HELP !
Thanks !


Kind regards and greetings from the Netherlands,


little star.

#298333 But what is a good book for Cognitive Behaviour Therapy? Is there a good book...

Posted by little star on 12 July 2013 - 07:01 PM

Yes, I am coming from the Netherlands ;-) .

I speak a little bit German ;-) .


Thanks for the links !


My psychologist has a book: Overcoming depersonalization and feelings of onreality...

He will treat me with this book....