I wanted to say that I've been through the worst of the worst when it comes to DP/DR, experiencing it day in and day out for 6 years chronically and now I'm 100 percent dp/dr free, everything appears "real" nothing looks fake or animated and life doesn't feel like a movie and my body doesn't feel alien /robotic/ animated anymore.
This has been the biggest mind fuck I never thought was possible, You know how when you're dp/dr'd you can't remember what "reality"even feels like well guess what when you get back to normal "reality" you can't even really remember what dp /dr felt like. Now imagine my situation, I go through 6 years of hell in dp/dr land never thought I would come out "normal" again and here I am free of dp/dr and feeling normal.
Now what really bothers me is what an absolutely completely surreal experience the whole thing was, it's like being in a 6 year long dream and waking up only to realize you're back where you started...
After about a year of trying to figure out what exactly had happened and the correlations that tied everything together i've come to the conclusion that "Normal" and "Reality" is not real, it's a lie an illusion. Reality is subjective and needs a conscious subjective experiencer (ego symbolic consciousness). "reality" and "normal" is just a form of comfortable consciousness in which you are content with your body awareness, mind and your environment. It's only an illusion of balanced awareness. The normal reality in which you see and feel and smell the world around you and experience as real is a union of belonging and understanding which occurs unconsciously and so consciously your mind is content with it's existence and does not alienate. Rather the normal content consciousness is a form of restrictive reality tunnel which filters that which it doesn't need.
On the other hand dp/dr reality is a very uncomfortable, no subjective experiencing sort of unrestricted form of reality that is chaotic, anxiety inducing and unconsciously operational (view as if your actions are robotic/like your watching a movie of your life etc)
What I have gathered is a lot of you have put yourselves out there into different planes of thought and are stuck in fear based thought loops, a lot of you like myself are analytical and deeply philosophical, you search for answers to many questions and overwhelm your minds. A lot of you have OCD, Anxiety, Depression, Panic attacks etc, a lot of you are your own worst enemies stuck in irrational fears and prisoners of your own mind and it's own devices.
You won't find answers unless you make changes if no change occurs time doesn't exist, you are like a clock and every change you make will put you further in time and every habit you repeat will keep you suspended in time. Seek change push the boundaries and most of all question your deepest and darkest fears, as long as you have those fears in you, you cannot transcend your own devils, demons, schizo fear, insanity, whatever unknown dark fear that keeps you stupid and insane.
Remember the game is not on the outside, the game is on the inside and the outside is a world of illusions there to test you, you must show if you are the fool or if you are the wise. Wisdom isn't knowing like many of you philosophers here know a lot of things, Wisdom is doing what you know and a lot of you still don't believe in your own wisdom.
There are no pills
UniversalShapeMember Since 04 Nov 2010
Offline Last Active Nov 07 2010 10:14 PM
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