But it’s like now I’m not so much freaked out about it because I don’t know what I feel towards it. I have a feeling of depersonalisation but not so much any feelings or thoughts towards it, and I’m not being able to recognise it.
... At the same time it sucks to have that empty feeling that you’ve almost sort of “turned into” the depersonalisation. At least that’s what I’m feeling right now.
Yes! That's exactly how I feel. I feel like I'm gone, and I have been fully consumed by the DPDR, I feel as though I can't recover because there is no "me" that even exists to recover. And I can't be scared to it, because it's like there isn't a part of me that can even fully process it.
I don't have anhedonia whatsoever, which im greatful for, but it's weird. I can experience emotions, but yet I feel like I don't even exist. I simply feel like there is no self, only consciousness. The idea of it just seems so permanent. Like the part of my brain that6 enforces my existence and feelings of connection is shut down forever. Like I have psychologically died.
EDIT: this sounds way more dark than I wanted it to be. For the most part I am ok, I still do feel like there is a tiny tiny part of me left.
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