I have little to no experience with autism and especially not in correlation to depersonalization but i can only imagine how difficult it must be to discover it now. I am however very familiar with being on the verge of a mental breakdown and feeling like you’re about to burst and i advice you to let it happen if you are able. whatever it is you are feeling, let it out. scream, cry, yell whatever it is. don’t keep all that pressure inside. it will help you connect with yourself and temporarily relieve you from the tension building up inside. and if there’s someone you feel comfortable confiding in, you should definitely do so. mental illness often comes with a lot of shame and frustration and part of going towards recovery is acceptance. this is who you are and where you are at right now and that is okay. it’s horrible and frustrating and sometimes insufferable but it’s okay and it will not be forever. at the moment i’m going through a pretty bad bout of dp myself and my body feels physically numb and strange with every movement. i try to connect with myself by going for a walk, taking care of my plants, watching shows and movies i really enjoyed as a kid as a way for me to become familiar with my life before dp. it’s different for everyone and ups and downs come without warning but if you find things that help you connect and cope, over time you will learn to manage it better.
i hope this can be of help to you. stay safe.
- Abe89 likes this