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santi123

Member Since 04 Jan 2020
Offline Last Active Oct 11 2020 02:52 PM
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Posts I've Made

In Topic: Thoughts on personal trauma.

22 March 2020 - 10:10 PM

I precede this board by 20 years.  My trauma began in 1971, before there was an internet to support a board.

My trauma didn't care if the board existed, or not.

I ruminated about my illness and symptoms alone, before there was a practical way to find others

who shared similar symptoms.  I didn't seek psychiatric help for my first 20 years.

This group has changed quite a bit over the years.  Baby boomers to millennials.

I was off and on researching the origins of my illness for 40 years.  If I could have ignored it, 

I certainly would have.  As it turned out, I solved my riddle.  At 17, I had a series of powerful temporal 

lobe seizures that damaged my temporal lobe; gifting me with the affective disorder of recurrent 

major depression.  Researching my "rare epileptic syndrome" led to explanations of all the odd

symptoms I experienced, which grounded me for the longer haul.  No, I don't regret the time I spent

searching for my answers. But, I never considered myself a neurotic. 

Ever since I was diagnosed about 1 year and 3 months, I have been constantly researching about it, day after day. Obviously since it disrupts your vision, feeling and so, it is nearly impossible for one to forget about it or not search it up since its constantly there.
Hence, this board here has been very very helpful for me and others to understand this disorder and feeling connected to others than are suffering the same thing, not feeling alone completely.  

Although, in my case, it was triggered by substance abuse and well my anxiety level spiked up abnormally, tricking my brain in believing that I am going through something traumatic events. Some have gone through therapy to understand their trauma and once they have resolved their trauma after countless amount of therapeutical seasons, they progress alot. However, in my case, I haven't had anything really traumatic, and reasoning this disorder everyday in the sense of what is my trauma had me always thinking. Therefore, I came to my senses that it might be the experience, discomfort and constant thought of this disorder that can result in it being my unresolved trauma? Researching it everyday can have a negative impact on my anxiety levels? Not sure. 


In Topic: is treatment necessary or can you heal alone?

15 March 2020 - 02:37 PM

Nutrition is very important, and can be challenging to get depending on your circumstances. Lately, I've been eating a lot of flash frozen meats, vegetables, and fruit. The other half of my diet is Larabars, which is probably an issue. I take all the supplements that are recommended to me by docs, including things I might be deficient in. Sleep, exercise, and psychological aspects are important too.

I know its been quite some time but have you taken any meds through the time you have been experiencing DP/DR? 


In Topic: is treatment necessary or can you heal alone?

18 February 2020 - 01:50 PM

In short, it is possible to heal by yourself. Are you doing anything that you think is particularly beneficial to recovery, or are you just giving it time and acceptance?

There's no proven medication for DP, though there's some limited evidence for a few, SSRIs being one example. Some people take antidepressants and feel more DPed. Treatments besides medication exist, such as talk therapy and lifestyle changes, though I imagine very few of them are designed to help with DP specifically.

The TMS that can target brain areas associated with DP is called rTMS, and is currently difficult for many people to receive, for logistical and financial reasons.

That's good, and that makes sense. Most people get DP during some kind of drug or mental health episode, and then start to recover. I'll just warn you not to be too reluctant to ask for help if need be, especially if you have depression or anxiety, in the form of therapy and lifestyle changes as well as medication

True, 
Well I always believe that nutrition has a huge impact on your overall health, so I tend to eat pretty healthy. In my case, DP/DR has not been triggered by emotional trauma or so, just weed induced DP/DR. 

In terms of supplements, I take magnesium, vitamin B12 and vitamin B6. It has helped me a lot in reducing my amount of anxiety. According to NCBI, there is a case study of a women being treated with Vitamin B12 due to her psychosis and time distortion. However, I believe that DP/DR is not psychosis but more as neurosis. https://www.ncbi.nlm...pubmed/15029091

Magnesium and vitamin B6 are found to reduce the tension of the nervous system and reduce the amount of anxiety. Nevertheless, this can be applied with a careful dosage. https://www.ncbi.nlm...les/PMC6298677/

 

Its been a month now that I have been taking this supplement and I see no side-effects, considering that I am quite sensitive to any sort of medication. 


In Topic: How do you see the world once you've recovered?

05 February 2020 - 03:37 PM

I had diagnosed DP on and off for three years now, but I think I had it probably my whole life, it just went undiagnosed for a long time.

It changes in intensity depending on my general perception of the world, and sometimes it goes away for longer periods, like months.

When I feel well, and I am able to realistically accept even the difficult things and in particular traumatic memories in my life, the DP goes away, and the world looks very different. (My DP is trauma induced, as part of dissociative response on repetitive traumatization in childhood. I never used drugs)

 

However, when I have a really strong DP, I feel body-less, or floating, or like an automaton, or a doll. Still, no one can actually see that, they cannot even tell that something is going on within me. It narrows down my perception of the world, in a way that it becomes more like 2D, and everything feels as if there is no perspective, both figuratively and literally. Once I had a particularly strong onset of DP while speaking onstage with more than 50 people in the audience. I could hear myself speaking, and I admired how well I was prepared, but I had no clue as to what I am talking about. All I could perceive was one bright light blinking at the very rear end of the auditorium. Besides DP, my main problem is GAD, but I have no problem with public speaking, go figure! I dread the usual situations, though, like grocery shopping...

 

When I get out of DP mode, it is as if my life suddenly has such a depth, and scent and taste, everything becomes crystal clear and bright, and is full of opportunities, that I prevented myself from seeing while I was DP. I suddenly can have so much energy, ideas, I feel a lot of love for my family and friends, and in general I feel really passionate about life. Once I said to a friend that I love her so much, just that I somehow do not manage to love her all the time, and that generally is how I feel with DP on and off. When I am DP, everything is on pause, until I can continue running, feeling and loving again.

Thank you for sharing a bit about your story with us. 
In general, I guess you become more hopeful about life rather than drown on it, I really liked your description. 

I hope you're having a beautiful day,
Santi 


In Topic: Is anyone seeing alot of floaters?

04 February 2020 - 03:47 AM

The onset of heavy eye floaters commenced shortly after temporal lobe seizures at age 17.  That was 48 years ago, and they are still with me.  I theorize that even a mild  insult to the temporal lobe can damage a neurological process that normally filters the floaters from your consciousness.

We're told they are harmless, but heavy floaters following a bright flash can indicate a torn retinae.  That is a medical emergency.

Im not sure if mine is that serious, hopefully not but ill keep that in mind, thanks(: