I have weird OCD-solipsistic thoughts and moderate DP/DR, feeling not real and stuff like that. I tried escitaloprám for 2days but had a panic attack ( only so far ) and quit. Now, due to isolation ( after almost recovering ) it´s worse then ever. I wont be able to go to work for 3 months.. I want to feel better, but Im very very scared of taking meds again. I think I wont be able to "survive" another 3 months without any help. I was in therapy for 1 year, which didnt help me at all. I am on St. John's wort for 1 d ( I stopped, bc I didnt have any of those pills ) and it always helped me. I still have Escitaloprám at home, but I m not able to take it since there are interactions with St. John´s wort.
Maybe I will call my psychiatrist tomorrow and ask him what to do; what do you guys think? Can an SSRI even help me with this situation? I mean I just want to feel "normal" again but every day in isolation it gets worse and worse. I even started running again, but it doesn´t even help me at all. I just want to enjoy holiday and stuff like that but with those solipsistic thoughts running trough my head 24/7 it´s just not possible. I had this stage of not feeling real and questioning everything for 1d like 5 months ago but just for 1d and now it´s 6hrs but it feels worse than ever. I called my GF 1 hr ago and she doesn´t want me to take medication bc she read an article, which said that there is a risk in suicide after taking SSRI, which Im scared of as well. I just don´t know what to do.. I just wanna live