Posted 17 January 2019 - 10:50 PM
Posted 17 January 2019 - 11:38 PM
maybe talking to someone or a therapist could help getting it off your chest so you dont feel so overwhelmed
Posted 23 January 2019 - 01:50 PM
My start of DR had something to do with karma too imo, I made a promise to myself and god to not do certain things anymore and focus only on other issues I had to fix like getting of benzo's, I promised god to not smoke weed anymore.
I smoked weed and boom DR.
I feel like its a very hard tough lesson and almost cannot be a fluke.
Hope you feel better soon.
Posted 23 January 2019 - 10:20 PM
well of course it was bad from you to joke about it . but you obviously regret it
you are not cursed . there are so many people who do horrible things and are happy fucks
it is your anxiety and dp/dr . and think like this : you "paid your dues" already because you suffered the whole time . it is over .
Posted 24 January 2019 - 10:59 PM
i hate people that would joke about something like that, death aint funny man, but u obv feel bad, hopefully u feel bad as in it wasnt good to joke about someones death and instead of feeling bad like o i joked about his death and now this happend to me and now i feel bad
its just wrong man
but i dont think thats y ur like this..
i get what ur saying tho, i feel like karma got me as well, but i think i fixed what had to be done, and i still have dp, maybe im still serving my time or whatever, but idk man
try to get better, doubt its that, but its never cool to joke about someones death
ud got to be fucked up in the head to do that, in my opinion
especially someone u knew..
but hopefully uve felt bad before this happend
Posted 26 January 2019 - 08:20 AM
- Layne likes this
Posted 23 April 2019 - 07:46 AM
This is going to sound ridiculous, and it is, but when I was about 6-7 I killed a bug in quite a callous way. That bug has not left my active memory in 20 years. I'd say I think about it every few weeks, and ruminate on things like "was that an angel in a bugs body and why I'm experiencing so much difficulty in life?". Sounds absolutely retarded I know but I wanted to get a message across:
yes you are experiencing difficulty because of your previous actions, but not because you're cursed. It's because you did something that doesn't fit in with your central morals because of peer pressure and so you feel guilt. So firstly, congratulations you are a good person. We all do things we wish we hadn't and can sometimes be brutal individuals for no good reason. Like Psyborg said, many people act in a bad way and don't receive karmic backlash at least not in any perceptible sense.
Secondly you're clearly in a phase where your with a lot of people who do drugs regularly. Drugs, anxiety, panic and DP are a horrendous mix.
Finally, a fear of heights and of falling is a very natural thing. I've been in an acute phase anxious cycle for a long time now and get a fear of heights and vertigo just by thinking about something similar when I'm sat chilling at home, or by seeing a facebook post of someone scaling the burj Khalifa without a harness. And then it takes a while to leave again and for me to settle.
This mans' death and the means of it has troubled and disturbed you because you're a normal decent person and you are having difficulty with the concept at present because you have acute anxiety where thoughts stick like glue. And boy do they just.
Posted 04 June 2019 - 03:43 PM
I think worrying intensely about things like karmic retribution or judgement from God can stem from earlier existing issues from things like emotional neglect or abuse, where we may have been made to feel that we were to blame for everything that happened around us, and so developed this hugely out-of-proportion sense of guilt and responsibility. If we are to blame for everything, we are responsible for everything, and can end up carrying the weight of the world on our shoulders, believing ourselves to be fundamentally sinful and bad.
Needless to say this is totally exhausting, but I think it's more about toxic shame than any judgement from on high.
Posted 04 June 2019 - 05:41 PM
You knew your friend killed himself due in part to the influence of a bad MDMA trip. So you joked about it. Then you had your own bad MDMA trip. Now you're suffering. There's a word for it, but its not Karma.
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