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hello guys please help me .. to get out of this situation

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real self
883 views 12 replies 4 participants last post by  Jurgen 
#1 ·
i feel my feeling and my action is not actual me

i feel my mind tried to hide my self .. and painful emotions .. maybe i m stuck in this..

my thinking is foggy and confusing .. and easliy distracted ..i cnt focus on one work and hold the emotion on it.

and self blame to my self

i want to clear all this and make myself real again .. and see the brightness and clarity back...in my life ..! :(

Please could you tell me the ...The recovering /healing process from the scratch ... ?

:sad: :sad:
 
#3 ·
You're not stuck in anything. Your mind, feelings, thoughts, are all yours. You may not accept them as a part of yourself but what you are feeling inside of you is very real.

Maybe you should confront your emotions and trace them back to where they came from and allow your mind to decide rather or not these feelings are acceptable.
 
#5 · (Edited by Moderator)
I don't think it should be that hard IMO.

When I think about something a sense of feeling usually follows thought.

You can think about an apple and a sense of feeling accommodates it. What I do after that is follow the feeling.

Thoughts can allude you to different places but I don't think feelings can because they are a part of who you are. Thinking only helps study what you are already feeling.
 
#7 · (Edited by Moderator)
Ok what do you do when you figure out what the negative emotions was.
I confront it
I accept it.
I study it
I fix it.

There are actually a myriad of ways on how to deal with it IMO. The main thing is though that you should not run away from it.
 
#9 · (Edited by Moderator)
I don't know. I'm a bit confused and I apologize. What if you do not know what caused it. Like I broke up with my boyfriend of 5 years and started dating someone else.... is that traumatic?
What's traumatic to me and what's traumatic to you are different.

Something can be traumatic to you while I can brush it off. Same goes vice-versa. If you think it was traumatic you should try to reflect on how you felt when you broke up with him. It may be so subtle that you may actually not even realize how much of an impact it had on you. It may even be very painful. The point is to reflect.

But yes IMO breaking up with something after that long can be very traumatic and difficult but it's usually because there are other variables in yourself which you are still allowing to linger on without self-reflection. Think of someone who eats cake everyday out of sheer pleasure but neglects in the long-run how much this will impact his health in the future.

The same thing applies to anyone living in a bad environment/being around people who make them feel bad/etc. It actually applies in all areas of life.

"The unexamined life is not worth living."
Socrates
 
#11 ·
I knew it had to be done though for me to be happy. I was very miserable and sad with him. It did hurt like crazy but I got through it ..
Okay.

Now think about him and try to look through his eyes to see how you behaved/felt and how what you did affected him. This will lead you to a truth about yourself.
 
#12 ·
I hurt him. I hurt him really bad. I could still cry about it to this day. It kills to be honest but who would ever want to think about that?? I have to see him every day at work and he doesn't look in my direction. He hates me even though I would love nothing more then to just say hi how are you. He has a child now a gf. I'm happy for him though..
 
#13 ·
I hurt him. I hurt him really bad. I could still cry about it to this day. It kills to be honest but who would ever want to think about that?? I have to see him every day at work and he doesn't look in my direction. He hates me even though I would love nothing more then to just say hi how are you. He has a child now a gf. I'm happy for him though..
It kills to be honest but who would ever want to think about that??
See that's the thing. You're choosing to run away from that.
You're not facing what you did to him. And what you did to him was something a part of yourself that is true and is hiding.

It's something that "killed" you but it's also something that killed him. Something that killed what he felt for you that is also a part of yourself when you broke up with him.

You need to dig deeper.
 
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