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Specific Symptom- can anyone relate?

psychosis depersonalization derealization ocd anxiety panic fear

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#1 Juliagulia

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Posted 08 February 2015 - 09:56 AM

Last night I was laying in bed and suddenly recalled a random "memory" of a mundane conversation that took place years ago. For whatever reason, it just didn't feel right, like it was foggy or perhaps part of a dream I had once, though I initially recalled it as a memory of an actual conversation. 

I layed there awhile not knowing whether this memory was real, imagined, part of a dream, etc. and became very confused and panicky. 

I feel very unsettled at the concept of questioning my own memory. 

Has anyone ever experienced anything like this? It's really causing me a ton of anxiety so any input at all would be appreciated. I keep thinking I must be going crazy!



#2 Sam1814

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Posted 09 February 2015 - 08:22 AM

This is one of the worst symptoms for me. Since my DP/DR began, I struggle with all of me memories, and feeling connected to them. My perception of memories has changed so drastically, that I doubt the validity of the things I'm recalling.. Did that really happen? Did I hallucinate them? Was it a dream? It's very unsettling.. The only thing that helps me, is to confirm the memory. Ask the person you were talking to, if they remember that conversation. If they confirm it, you will feel much better.

#3 Juliagulia

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Posted 09 February 2015 - 09:04 AM

Thank you for replying. It feels so much better to know I'm not the only one. Yes, I do feel alot better when I confirm the memory, which I think has a lot to do with ocd (doubt followed by compulsive reassurance seeking). It really bugs me though, when I can't remember full details, like who I would have been talking to, so I don't have anyone to ask for reassurance. It's the worst being left with the uncertainty of not knowing whether a memory happened or was imagined.

#4 Sam1814

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Posted 09 February 2015 - 10:05 PM

Happens to me frequently.. I actually suffered from DP/DR before, about 8 years ago. I saw a psychologist who knew nothing of the disorder, but we had "talk therapy" for nearly a year.. And I can't remember ANY of it.. Just his name. Can't remeber when it went away so to speak, or what techniques he used.. Nothing.. I even went so far as to pull up his office on google street view, and I don't even recognize the address or the building.. Made me really wonder if I dreamed it or hallucinated it. It's unsettling. I clnstant verifying my memories with other people. Even then it doesn't always help. Just hold on. Youre gonna be okay. <3

#5 Mar1982

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Posted 13 February 2015 - 05:56 PM

Hey there!  This is a symptom that I found difficult to describe to people (or maybe just one that I don't see people post a lot about so I thought it was just me) I call it random memories.  It's funny because I've always had a VERY GOOD memory- remembering more than my family about our lives and all the memories were very clear and vivid and since DP random memories - nothing bad- but just really really random things, people, objects, even corners of my childhood home, which I hadn't thought of in over 20 years- pop up into my head and then I ask my mom about them to confirm them. They are all accurate :-) It's amazing how the brain works and how things can be stored for so long and we don't even realize it!



#6 milpool

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Posted 19 February 2015 - 08:55 AM

 Its all anxiety dude, you yourself are manipulating your thoughts to make it seem worse than it is. I have my own symptom that is slightly similar that Ive been doing  for the past few months. Like specifically I would watch something or smell something or listen to something and itd remind me of a memory, and then id sorta "feel" as if I was there and then start tripping out and get nervous. Slowly but surely ive realized that this isnt "automatic" I was just literally making myself think these thoughts and I noticed after I relaxed and calmed down that I have myself to blame for these outrageous thoughts.



#7 Freddy_Fred

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Posted 04 March 2015 - 02:10 PM

Im experiencing something more like Mar1982. Memories I hadn't thought for quite some time(years at times) are popping randomly out of nowhere. For me its quite surprising since I couldn't recall in detail what occurred in a previous week lets say before DP occurred. However, they are not coming into question. I'm also having vivid dreams that I can clearly recall. 



#8 cnance2

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Posted 09 March 2015 - 07:28 PM

My memories have seem to become very foggy as well. I cant really remember much of anything from the last year back. its very scary and makes me very sad. An example, My boyfriend can remember our first kiss but i cant. It feels like i would go through every day like its a movie being played out in front of me. I dont remember what i did last week. Its very strange.





Also tagged with one or more of these keywords: psychosis, depersonalization, derealization, ocd, anxiety, panic, fear

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