After my 2-week long experience with depersonalization/anxiety-fueled near-psychosis (I don't what to call it, but it was fucking horrible) - I feel different. The anxiety subsided and is now minimal. I take .5mg Xanax as needed, and it definitely helps.
However, I still have this weird feeling that I'm stuck inside myself - I feel disconnected from my surroundings, and to really try and focus on one thing makes me anxious. I can never fully relax. It's like I don't feel comfortable seeing through my own two eyes...sometimes, I'll look at my hands and it's the strangest thing. I question who I am, what I am - I get this weird sensation that I'm living in a first-person shooter or something. Of course, this makes me anxious. It's hard to explain - it's like my eyes are just cameras. I don't feel my surroundings like a human being should. I'm wondering what could cause this - Depression? Anxiety? The complete death of ego that I endured? Maybe depersonalization is still affecting me, in a more subtle way?
I have an appointment with a psychiatrist soon and will likely be prescribed Lexapro or another SSRI. I'm scared to take it. I've heard varying things about SSRI's on this site. Who can share their experiences with Lexapro or any other SSRI's? Could it worsen my condition? What are the possibilities?