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Feeling too responsible for other people


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#13 Oliver L.

Oliver L.

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Posted 08 September 2013 - 08:39 PM

 
 

 

So I was talking to my psychotherapist and he says that it could be possible that if you have parents who can't handle strong emotions like anger, rage and jealously etc that as a child who is completely dependent on them for love and survival you might start hiding these emotions from a very young age as a means to protect them, so as a baby you actually start to parent your parents and protect them, it could even be something as simple as seeing the look on your mothers face when you get angry which makes you start protecting them.

The fallout from this is that when you are an adult you still feel overly responsible for the way other people feel and you feel other peoples emotional states are your responsibility. Where this leaves you is that you don't know what your own real feelings are having repressed many of your raw emotions and what is your responsibility and what isn't, what is you and what is not you. I feel this may be the case for me as in social situations I often take too much responsibility for the atmosphere and vibe of the situation that I should be correcting things if they aren't right and harmonious and I take on too much how I make other people feel.

Anyone relate to this? take on other peoples stuff too much and get confused about what is yours and what isnt?

 

 

I think this very much does happen but it's also important to remember we are also protecting ourselves in this process, it is not simply an "either or" (not that you were implying that).



#14 = n

= n

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Posted 21 October 2013 - 11:32 AM


Absolutely. 100%

I never saw this post before; i knew i felt too responsible for others and also knew my relationship with my parents was as you describe Pablo, but until reading this i dont believe id put it together so clearly. Thank you, this has brought me insight.






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