do you truly think that sometimes you do this to yourself - Discussion - Depersonalization Community

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do you truly think that sometimes you do this to yourself

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#1 jc


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Posted 21 August 2004 - 08:01 AM

i have to admit that most of the time during my life so far every moment of anxiety ive experienced has been actually created by myself...
i havnt always had dp but ive always been anxious at the most simplest of things..

as a youngster sitting on the shop wall with my friends when we had a little bit of trouble with shop keepers id always be the first to run home shaking and crapping myself...

when there was the potential for a gang fight id be the first to crap myself

when it came to drinking for the first time i recall running home after about 2 sips of cheap cider

even now im doing it ,telling myself i shouldnt be doing this,i shouldnt be doing that,i feel as though im wrapping myself up in cotton wool,and this is really whats causing my major introspection....

anyone else feel they are causing alot of this anxiety themselves by overanalyzing every waking moment???

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Posted 21 August 2004 - 09:38 AM

i wonder this all of the time

#3 kenc127


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Posted 21 August 2004 - 11:39 AM

yes. I think somewhere in our development as children and adolescents, we didn't get the emotion we needed from those around us we looked to to give it (parents, friends, and other loved ones). So we "create" anxiety/drama (without knowing it) as a coping mechanism to compensate for the emotion we didn't receive as children/teens. The problem is, the emotion is bad emotion, and makes us have things like DP and DR. If the majority of the emotions we received as children and adolescents was negative (put downs, getting spanked, getting yelled at etc.), then I think we develop a tendency to mimic those emotions via self punishment because that is how our definition of love was formed. So to answer your question, "Do we do this to ourselves?" Well yes and no. I think the DP is caused by a combination of poor anxiety-related coping skills and prolonged periods of intense anxiety. So I think in a way we induce DP because we don't handle our anxiety properly. I think the answer to getting rid of DP is to develop the natural, necessary coping skills to handle life's curve balls and difficulties, and in turn DP will fade. The problem is, putting this into action. It's a bitch and takes a lot of hard work. I wish I were there.

#4 Guest_Lauren_*

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Posted 21 August 2004 - 02:02 PM

yes, i overanalyze everything...and i act how i know people want me to act. i say what i know people want to hear because i know what they want to hear. but yes...i do overanalyze everything

#5 luke1979


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Posted 21 August 2004 - 04:10 PM

i think that something triggered the dp/drhrough my constant anxiety and obsessions im not helping the dp/dr go away.
if i could learnt to somehow break the cycle of obsessive thinking, i could probably beat this.


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Posted 22 August 2004 - 09:43 AM

jc, I do not believe we do this to ourselves. Depersonalization and derealization is a problem in the brain, whether it was born from anxiety,obsessing or depression. To me it is no different than having a different illness like cancer or heart disease, some of us will have this and some of us will not. This is just my own thought on this, I have looked back at my life and thought is it possible that I am doing this to myself and the answer for me is absolutely not. If I thought that I was doing it to myelf then I would be able to stop whatever it is that I am doing to make it go away.


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Posted 22 August 2004 - 08:46 PM

I do it to myself through worrying and obsessive thinking and overall anxiety...things I often THINK I dont have control over.

#8 dalailama15


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Posted 22 August 2004 - 10:27 PM

I’ve hit this topic in several posts lately, but I think it is worth briefly repeating. I absolutely agree with gem, and answer the question, “No, I don't.”

I experience the core depersonalization symptoms virtually all the time (with moments of exception) and it seems to me that this is just the way my brain interprets and processes sensory information-–the way my eyes see, the way my memories are stored and retrieved.

I know this is not in the mainstream, especially in this forum, but I have tried to find the reasons why I would do this to myself, and after considerable time and effort–-I just don’t see them. I am just tired of trying to believe, with no real evidence, that I am in some way doing this to myself for some obscure reason.

And I see no reason to continue searching for the thing that was already there, the thing that the drugs triggered or uncovered, when I see no compelling evidence that such a thing even exists.

There are other explanations suggested by the dual causes of these same sets of symptoms: Drugs and Trauma. But I won’t start.

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