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My DP recovery paradox


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#13 Findmywayhome

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Posted 11 February 2021 - 11:34 PM

Didnt want to hear anything in particular, just the truth, so I appreciate that.

Yeah, I remember reading a post on here which postulated that almost all cases of DP have an underlying psychotic element, but often times its not severe enough to be considered as its own symptom of psychosis. Which is also why I think schizophrenia and OCD are considerably related to dissociation. I think I get what the post means. Recently ive been struggling with the thought of, am I still dreaming? I had this horrible dream about a week ago where I must of had like four or five false awakenings. I remember I dreamt that I woke up and everything felt so vivid (as in it resembled my waking state, obviously things arent vivid in DP) and I was absolutely convinced I was awake. Since then, im constantly questioning if im even awake, Or if I ever have been, its so bizarre that these extremely absurd thoughts actually scare me.

Have you ever seeker psychological or pharmaceutical treatment for your self described insanity?

#14 coolwhip27

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Posted 12 February 2021 - 09:21 PM

There’s no doubt in my mind that DP is always the result of a psychotic element. There is still something to be said about what I was writing about in this post. What’s universal about what I described is these patterns of trying to “run away” from or “fix” thoughts rather than “accepting” them inwhich they are no longer a problem.

I’m sure that you’ve heard of this “accepting thoughts” thing, and I’d like to tell you that this is most definitely real and important with DP. Describing the actual act of your mind in dealing with these thoughts isn’t easy because it’s all metaphysical. And it all takes place RIGHT NOW. So, for me, I had to learn to literally do the exact opposite in what I used to do (in my mind) in dealing with these thoughts.

There is actual psychosis, which is prominent with fear, and then there is simply pure OCD. You said you had thoughts of not actually being awake which scares you. And I can understand because on top of those thoughts, your DP might make reality “fuzzy” so to speak, so it feels less real. But the learned reaction of fear in existential thoughts is such a prominent form of DP. And your obsession with it is what keeps you scared.

I take medication for my psychotic thoughts and also for OCD intrusive thoughts. I would like you to know that when I wrote that post, I was at my worst. I feel much better now, but when you’re at your worst, nothing gives hope.

#15 Findmywayhome

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Posted 12 February 2021 - 11:57 PM

I absolutely agree, you hit the nail right on the head.

Ah I see, glad your feeling better. Stay strong

#16 Grindelwald

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Posted 14 February 2021 - 01:20 AM

Didnt want to hear anything in particular, just the truth, so I appreciate that.

Yeah, I remember reading a post on here which postulated that almost all cases of DP have an underlying psychotic element, but often times its not severe enough to be considered as its own symptom of psychosis. Which is also why I think schizophrenia and OCD are considerably related to dissociation. I think I get what the post means. Recently ive been struggling with the thought of, am I still dreaming? I had this horrible dream about a week ago where I must of had like four or five false awakenings. I remember I dreamt that I woke up and everything felt so vivid (as in it resembled my waking state, obviously things arent vivid in DP) and I was absolutely convinced I was awake. Since then, im constantly questioning if im even awake, Or if I ever have been, its so bizarre that these extremely absurd thoughts actually scare me.

Have you ever seeker psychological or pharmaceutical treatment for your self described insanity?

I've dabbled in lucid dreaming some. I find pinching your nose and trying to breathe is a great way of identifying if you're dreaming. It has saved me from numerous false awakening loops and nightmares. But you always have to expect that you will still be able to breathe when you pinch your nose. Expect that you are in  a dream when you do it. 






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