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im very desperate.. i cant accept..


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#1 leminaseri

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Posted 14 September 2020 - 12:12 AM

hey guys..

im one time again very desparate..

quite before i started to work last night i did cried very severe because i cant accept my situation. although im emotionally numbed, my experiences in the last 9 months affect me emotionally. thats because i was being a very emotional person before i got ill. and if this goes on like this im sure it will change my personality and what a fucking worst case scenario is this bro.. i dont fucking know how should i accept this im watching myself how im going broken with the time. how can i exit this bad spiral? i have this only for 9 months but i overthink so much, im suffering like for 9 years. i will talk about this with my therapist tomorrow but how i can accept the changing of my whole personality. every memory of my past is like senseless or not relatable because my personality which i cant feel changes out of my control..

i have a very lovely girlfriend and i love her so much and that hurts me to feel only a little bit when she texts me i love you or hugs me. i have to commit such a big effort to take this relationship and i dont want to lose her. she is the only thing in my life what is valuable.

and i have a weird feeling this cant be cured or i cant recover.

i cried so motherfucking severe i did got afraid of start to laugh and go crazy and i had gotten a panic attack..

guys, please tell me. whats the worth of life when i have to go without my girlfriend? why it doesnt give me at least the compensation to live for my girlfriend and marrie with her? stop saying live for yourself. i dont have a myself. im a nobody with a conciousness

#2 Mayer-Gross

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Posted 14 September 2020 - 07:23 AM

Because your outset is very recent and other interventions currently is very speculative or difficult to try I would chose a psychological  approach as if it is a anxiety disorder. Many have a good response to that if it is very recent. This site with two books written as e-books have been of benefit to many. Likely the best way to address it as a anxiety/panic disorder. https://anxietynomor..._derealisation/



#3 leminaseri

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Posted 14 September 2020 - 08:29 AM

Because your outset is very recent and other interventions currently is very speculative or difficult to try I would chose a psychological approach as if it is a anxiety disorder. Many have a good response to that if it is very recent. This site with two books written as e-books have been of benefit to many. Likely the best way to address it as a anxiety/panic disorder. https://anxietynomor..._derealisation/


thanks for your reply. im at a cbt already. i hope it will helps me..

#4 Mayer-Gross

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Posted 14 September 2020 - 10:40 AM

Fine you can use it but actually I posted in the wrong thread. It was meant as a reply to this post. 
https://www.dpselfhe...howtopic=101312



#5 cutiecarol

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Posted Today, 01:21 AM

I used to feel so many of the same things you've described. I know how miserable and hopeless it feels, but I promise there's hope! No matter how bad it gets, recovery is 100% possible. After about three years of suffering I am completely back to my old normal self. Try as hard as you can to ignore any strange thoughts and sensations and focus on living as normal a life as possible. It will seem impossible at first, but if you can find a way to consistently stay busy your brain will begin to heal and it'll get easier day by day. You will feel emotionally alive again soon. I didn't think it was possible ever not feel like a robot again, but it is! Best of luck to you!






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