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Dealing with Death.

Posted by Wendy, 14 November 2013 · 281 views

Dealing with Death.

Death can be a struggle - whether you're mourning over a loved one or just afraid of dying, it's always a struggle because it's something that we are not familiar with. We do not know what happens after death; some may find solace in religion and faith, but it's a completely unknown concept to us. We fear the unknown and it's completely human to try to understand something that's unknown, especially if it's something that we perceive as eternal. We cannot stop death (unless the government finds a way to make us completely immortal because that would be bad-ass), but we can try to cope with it as best as possible - by coping, I mean, push it out of our heads completely.

Step One: Realize that you will not be forgotten. Your amazing legacy will carry on throughout the ages, depending on what you do, of course. If you were to have a family with children, the children would remember you and then have their own families, tell stories about you to their children and so on. It's a long chain of awesome stories, hell, I'm still hearing about my great, great grandfather - so, you'll probably have the same thing going for you when you die; not to mention friends and friends-of-friends. You'll never be forgotten, you won't burn out. People will still be talking about that time you got so shit-faced, you jumped off a roof and into a pool, no worries.

Step Two: Talk to someone about this fear - find someone that you know will understand you or listen to what you have to say and start conversing about your fear and what brought the fear on in the first place. I was in this boat before and I can second this; talking to someone about your fear of death is seriously effective, especially knowing that others are in the same boat as you. Don't worry, life isn't singling you out - everyone dies and everyone is just as confused as you are.

Step Three: Live your life. As simple as that is, you should just live your life. Let's get one thing straight: You're afraid of death, so you'll spend your entire life fearing it until it actually comes? Listen, you'll never make complete sense of death, so just accept it and live your life the way that you want to live it. Go outside, hang with friends, explore - this life is limitless with activities and things to do, so why not make it a goal to try everything out? Living is the best way to counter-act your fear of death, as if it wasn't obvious, huh?

Step Four: Remind yourself constantly that you are a healthy and functioning individual - you're strong-willed, especially you early-seasoned and veterans of depersonalization/derealization. You're all strong, good-willed and have a lot of life ahead of you. Remind yourself of this and continue with step three.

From my personal experience, doing those steps was nearly the best thing for me - I had an incredibly intense fear of death, to the point where I was paralyzed and immobile. I realized that, there is no point in sitting here worrying about what's going to happen - it's inevitable, I can't change it, I can't skeeve my way out of death; so, I should live to my fullest and live as thought each day is my last. We only have one life; live it to the fullest and live it the way you want to live it.

(I just outlined some general stuff that helped me out; if you have anymore questions, I'd be happy to answer any of them. I suffered from this fear for nearly five years of my life and I'm happy to say that I'm completely recovered from this irrational fear. I hope this helped someone, cheers.)




Death is the most dumb existential fear ever. People that are afraid of death are probably afraid of real life issues and are using death as a distraction. I say this from my own experience.

One of the primary root causes of my DP was the death of my mother. Not really the fact of her dying, but all the consequences that it brought to my family (which was already dysfunctional and ill equiped to deal with life in general).

August 2020

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