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eddy1886

Member Since 11 Oct 2012
Offline Last Active Yesterday, 07:44 PM
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#442650 The world looks real, but...

Posted by eddy1886 on 23 March 2017 - 02:44 PM

I am now a cycnical realist and couldnt care less whats going on in the world UNLESS it is affecting those less fortunate...

 

Rich business people are all just misers as far Im concerned......

All politicians are seriously corrupt....

Major sports have now become money making rackets...

Image is everything if you want fame and fortune...

Most modern music stars cant sing or play an instrument...

Humans are destroying the planets eco systems (rainforests, coral reefs etc)

Most people woundnt do s**t for you unless they gain from it themselves...

The news is either completely exaggerated or just plain lies...

If your not seriously wealthy you are just a statistic...

Mental health issues are just brushed under the carpet and frowned upon...

Illicit Drugs are at the heart of nearly all crime....

 

Im gonna shut up now but thats my cynical realistic rant for the day..........




#442010 Whats wrong with me?

Posted by eddy1886 on 21 March 2017 - 05:25 PM

Yup its still dissociation!




#441546 recovery?

Posted by eddy1886 on 20 March 2017 - 04:28 PM

LOL eddy.

 

It's not funny, but in these dark times, a bit of British humour comes out. 

IRISH!




#441402 recovery?

Posted by eddy1886 on 20 March 2017 - 02:09 AM

I think the lack of replies to this post speaks volumes...




#439858 No sence of sleep

Posted by eddy1886 on 13 March 2017 - 01:54 PM

Really eddy?

Mezona I honestly cant remember the last time I slept properly and actually woke up rested....I am in a constant state of mental fatigue....Even when I do manage to fall into a proper deep sleep I can almost sense my anxiety rising in my sleep....As a result I often wake up more mentally tired than when I went to sleep...

 

As for falling asleep from genuine physical and mental tiredness? I dont even know what that feels like anymore....Most of the time I have to almost force myself to sleep.....I honestly cant remember the last time I drifted off to sleep naturally....That was one of the first things to go when I developed DP....

 

Even when I sleep my mind is in alert, race mode....




#439538 can foods trigger dissociation dp/dr ?

Posted by eddy1886 on 12 March 2017 - 07:03 AM

Thanks for both you're replies much appreciated ☺ im just going to continue trying my best to keep busy and continue working out , eating healthy at times i get low and feel so dame angry that this is happening to me its so frustrating

Fighting it doesnt work ( At least it hasnt in my 20 plus years of having this crap)

 

But getting angry at it is absolutely allowed...

 

You are totally allowed to lose your temper from time to time when dealing with this f*****g b******t !!!....

 

And any body that tells you otherwise can go to hell as far as im concerned...

 

Funny how people who have little colds and flus and tummy aches are allowed to bitch and moan and be grumpy and its all very acceptable because they are "ILL"

 

But when we want to have a rant about how shit we feel its all pushed to one side or under the carpet....Friends, family, doctors....They are all guilty of it....Its sickening!




#439530 Would you rather?

Posted by eddy1886 on 12 March 2017 - 06:53 AM

If you could guarantee me an ABSOLUTE DEFINITE END to this hell I would absolutely put up with chronic severe DP for a good number of years...

 

This is the whole problem with DP....There seems to be no end to it....Nothing gives proper long term relief...

 

I mean even the meds I take that give me a lot of relief from the Chronic form basically only improve my life to a 5 out of 10 level instead of the zero out of ten it is whilst going through chronic/severe DP...

 

 

Chronic / Severe DP = No functionality!!! ......At any level (Have been there many times especially in the early days / This is basically a mental hell of immense indescribable suffering)

 

Mild / Mid DP = Functioning!!! ......But at a lower than average human  level (This is where I am most of the time ONLY because of my meds)

 

Zero DP = Living!!!! .....Getting on with lifes ups and downs like any average human being (I have sadly completely forgotten what it is like to have this zest for life)




#439490 can foods trigger dissociation dp/dr ?

Posted by eddy1886 on 12 March 2017 - 05:59 AM

Nobody actually really knows the answer to this....

 

BUT just like any other medical condition (mental or physical) eating healthy more than likely helps...As to how much it helps nobody knows...

 

DP in my opinion (and in the opinion of many shrinks and doctors ive seen over the years) is a chemical imbalance in the brains chemistry...Im sure if proper detailed research was carried out they would discover there are foods that could help correct this chemistry imbalance....Problem is that brain chemistry is extremely complicated and the study of it is in its infancy....

 

So!,  Anyone who discovers that a certain food or diet relieves their DP has done so accidentally and there isnt any hard scientific evidence behind it....Its basically luck....The other thing is that everybody is different and we all have different physical and mental make ups....So what works for one doesnt necessarily work for another....

 

Thats exactly why meds that work for one dont work for another....And when it comes to medicines to treat mental ill health the doctors and scientists dont actually really know why this happens...They also cant really explain why most of these drugs help with mental health conditions for some but not for others....They just know they work through trial and error....

 

The other thing to note here is the Placebo Effect....There is a lot of evidence through scientific experiments that people can simply believe their diet or a medicine or exercise etc has improved their condition....I dont doubt this at all simply because I dont underestimate the power of the human mind.....I mean my mind has thrown all kinds of disturbing beliefs my way over the years that have been very very convincing...Whos to say a false belief cant work in a positive way as well...AND if it does I recommend stick with it!.......Cos God knows weve all tried many other ways to rid ourselves of this awful condition....




#437930 What are the best distractions?

Posted by eddy1886 on 08 March 2017 - 01:33 AM

A hobby that you are TRULY interested in and that grabs your focus for hours on end...It can be anything from running to making jewelry to collecting stamps....It just has to be of interest to you personally and more importantly have lots of constant variation and also reward you with personal satisfaction....It can even be your work if that floats your boat...What you dont want is to be doing something for the sake of doing it....That will become boring quite quickly and DP loves boredom...

 

My aquariums (tropical fish) work wonders for me....

 

I also find being out in nature (parks, lakes, rivers, canals, hills etc etc) very helpful....

 

Honestly if its a hobby you have to force yourself to do its a waste of time (You MUST have a passion for your chosen activity) Otherwise its too much like hard work and your mind will just tune out.....And really what you are trying to achieve is to get your mind to tune IN....

 

Maybe take a look back to when you were younger and saw something or somebody doing something that made you think to yourself    "Thats amazing!!!! I would love to try that !!!!"    ..............The thing about hobbies nowadays is that we have access to the internet and as a result access to tons of info on how to get started etc etc......

 

YouTube videso will teach you how to do anything these days....Research becomes a major part of your chosen hobby and all you have to do is Boot Up your laptop....The days of reading endless amounts of books and running around pestering people to find out how to do things is over....Its all there on the screens in front of us almost in an instant...




#437906 New here. Long term sufferer.

Posted by eddy1886 on 08 March 2017 - 01:15 AM

eddy, I understand where you're coming from. and if it doesn't work for you, it doesn't work for you. but it's important to keep in mind that no one's experience is universal, and just because it doesn't work for you doesn't mean it can't help someone else. it's totally fine if you want people to know that it didn't work for you! but it's reckless to insist that your experience is universal.

 

for some people it's just about finding the right meds. for others it's about addressing things that got ignored. and some people won't fit into either option, or will need both to make the progress they're looking for.

 

the things we say have an impact on others, and it's not always a positive one.

Apologies!

 

You are absolutely right tfiio....Im sure CBT could work for some...Ans its definitely worth a shot.......

 

I was just a bit cranky when I posted because I was so feckin frustrated from lack of sleep...




#437514 New here. Long term sufferer.

Posted by eddy1886 on 06 March 2017 - 11:54 PM

Not to be a kill/joy or party/pooper but 6 months of CBT didnt do squat for my DP except put a deeper hole in my pocket....And if your gonna tell me I didnt stick with it long enough im sorry but 6 minutes of DP is too long for me to wait around for help let alone 6 months...

 

One of these days people are gonna realise DP is down to a chemical imbalance in the brain and you simply cant think your way out of it or retrain your thinking patterns to cope with it....

 

If you look at the majority of so called recovery stories they all say the same thing in general (They all basically did their best to ignore it and it kinda went away on its own)

 

I dont think any of them said they were able to retrain their thinking strategies....The rest of the "so called" recovery stories involved meds and the ongoing use of said meds....

 

When youve had DP to the extent I and alot of others on here have had and still have it (CHRONIC) its actually bordering on a psychotic condition without the visual or audible delusions....

 

To me its almost akin to an inner mind psychosis if that makes any sense...You dont see things or hear things that arent really there but you sure as hell imagine alot of disturbing inner mind crap....Not only that its so seriously obsessive and repetitive that its totally impossible to even begin to combat it with alternate thinking strategies or patterns.....

 

Its the persistent obsessive side of DP thats the big problem with it.....

 

I often used to describe it to the various therapists and shrinks I attended over the years that it was like my mind was like a vinyl record with a scratch on it.....I was playing along nicely in life with my mental health then one day my needle got stuck in a groove/scratch and ever since its just been going round and round playing the same piece of awful music over and over....

 

I just want someone to lift my needle out of the groove move it forward and put it down again so I can play out the rest of my life like any other normal person does...

 

As im writing this its 4.53 am and i havent slept a wink because my racing obsessive insomniac mind wont let me....Thanks again DP!




#435642 New here. Long term sufferer.

Posted by eddy1886 on 02 March 2017 - 03:56 PM

You are not alone....All of us on here are very familiar with what you are going through as regards your mental health...

 

Please dont feel guilty because you are not well and havent been able to give your daughter ultimate care....Im sure you have done your utmost best under the circumstances...

 

My heart always goes out to mothers with this awful condition...Whatever about a fella feeling numb...A mother feeling numb when it comes to loving her child must be absolutely horrendous....

 

Please hang on in there...It will improve in time....You just have to surround yourself with the proper people as regards doctors, psychiatrists, therapists, family, friends etc etc....Avoid anybody who doesnt want to show you patience, tolerance, kindness and love right now....They will not do you any good...Dont let people pep talk you to fob you off......Its time for you to stand up and tell people..."Im not well....I need help" Dont be embarrassed and f**k the stigma....

 

If anybody tells you to pull your socks up and get on with it tell them to go f**k themselves.....These types of people are to be avoided like the plague....They will do you more harm than good........Surround your self in caring patient understanding people for the next while until you start to feel a little better....

 

And yes with the right help you will improve and start to feel better....I promise...

 

Please please take things very very easy for the next while....Its tiny tiny steps right now....You need to reduce your stress levels as much as you can right now....Any kind of undue stress is going to just make things worse....You need to explain all this to your partner and he needs to step up to the plate as regards looking after your daughter and making sure you are as comfortable and destressed as possible....

 

You need all the positive help you can get....Dont be afraid to ask for it and DONT try to get through this alone...

 

Go easy on yourself miss...




#435610 Help!!

Posted by eddy1886 on 02 March 2017 - 03:29 PM

Yes sounds very much like DP...

 

Have you been using any illegal drugs like marijuana etc?

 

Or have you been suffering with anxiety?

 

Its also brought on through stress from excessive worry or guilt...

 

The classic symptom of DP is the obsessive thinking that its something worse or that you are losing your mind...This is just one of many upsetting and disturbing symptoms of Depersonalization...

 

Please understand that although it feels very disturbing, strange and uncomfortable it is not dangerous and you are very sane.....You have not lost your mind as your reality testing is very much in tact...

 

DP causes alot of intrusive disturbing thinking....It causes the sufferer to start thinking they are going crazy....

 

If you continue to feel unwell and are not functioning at a reasonable level you may need to seek help from a doctor or psychiatrist or therapist...

If it becomes really troublesome medicine can help....

 

Please reduce your stress levels as best you can....Stress and DP love each other...

 

You are not alone...there are many of us on here who know exactly what you are going through....It gets better with time...




#435514 Mindfulness meditation

Posted by eddy1886 on 02 March 2017 - 12:07 PM

Broken when it comes to external fears like agrophobia or the fear of being in social situations etc you can gradually desensitize yourself to them by slowly allowing yourself back into these situations nice and steadily...Bit by bit....Basically you dont have to over expose yourself to the fear

 

Its the internal fears like the CONSTANT fear you are losing your mind or developing schizophrenic that are the hard ones to erradicate....You simply get no respite from them

 

Theres a big difference between exposing yourself to a fear physically to over come it and trying to expose yourself to a mental internal fear that seems to come from nowhere over and over (In fact constant intrusive internal mental fears are very very hard to deal with because they seem to have no logical explanation and just dont give us a break)

 

For instance you know you dont like being in crowds because it makes you uncomfortable...So you can step out of the situation for a while to take a break and relax a bit...

 

This is impossible with internal persistent obsessive fearful thinking...Its internal and constant...There is no escape from it hence there is no welcome break to help you desensitize yourself from it...

 

To properly get used to something a decent break or rest from it every so often is required...DP doesnt give us that break unfortunately...

 

I mean if you worked 24 hours a day, 7 days a week in your job it would soon become a serious pain in the butt....You would also probably eventually die from exhaustion or at least become very ill...

 

DP is like the mental equivalent of this....

 

Anyway the point im trying to make here is that a change is as good as a rest but proper rest from all aspects of life is absolutely essential...(Even if its stuff that you really enjoy)




#435370 Dating a 16 yr old

Posted by eddy1886 on 02 March 2017 - 04:36 AM

Its very simple....Once you are breaking no laws you can do what you damn well like........

 

Lets face it....A 16 year old girl is probably more mature than a a fella double her age...Boys NEVER grow up...They stay 17 forever...Girls on the other hand get smarter and more mature much quicker...And they continue on that path until the day they die....Boys will always be stunted when it comes to maturity...

 

If your happy and shes happy and you guys are being careful as regards birth control etc you are doing nothing wrong...

 

In this era age is just a number to be honest...The real secret to relationships is compatibility...You need to have a proper physical attraction to each other, lots of things in common, enjoy each others company and most of all enjoy doing lots of different things together...Relationships should be 50/50...give and take...sometimes they swing 70/30 in either direction but thats ok.....Its when its a constant take take take or give give give, thats when its time to get out....

 

Now if you are a typical young red blooded male who just wants to use this girl for sexual gain I think you seriously need to take a good look at yourself...Girls are not objects to be used and abused by dominating boys....

 

Treat her with the utmost respect!!!