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My dp story:

so i experienced dp for short amounts of time when it was late at night or around large loud groups of people but it would always be gone the next morning when i would wake up... then about a year ago i smoked a bit too much weed using pieces i hadnt used before and bam, got crazy faded like never before and had an anxiety attack. i also started tripping and hearing things. Ive had Insomnia since before the dp started and now im told that sleep deprivation and bud is not a good combination. lol. but ya i was even hearing stuff. the whole weed thing was kinda a slip up out of anger from getting dumped by a girlfriend. im a christian and dont really normally smoke or drink or anything. especially now that i have this. it seems to make it worse for me..... so ya for the next 3 or 4 days i felt really fuzzy but couldnt quite put my finger on what was wrong. then i just kinda drifted through the motions of life for about the next two months untill one day i realized "holy crap, i dont know if im alive or real". so i think even during those months inbetween i had dp but just never thought about it really or in was very minimal and unnoticable. but ya since that realization that something was off ive had all kinds of tests and mri's and all kinds of junk and doctors had no idea what was wrong. idiots.. till i made a yahoo answers post describing what i felt. The whole dreamy unreal feeling. And the emotionlessness and especially the disconnect from my past and childhood.... thats when someone responded and mentioned looking into depersonalization and derealization. and ya, as soon as i started reading about it i knew that it was exactly what was wrong with me...and pretty much since then ive had it. im 18 now and about to graduate from highschool. Im going to be attending Belmont University next fall and majoring in song writing. oh ya. i forgot. im in love with music. or was atleast untill i lost my desire to do anything and everything i love anymore. ugh it pisses me off. how can i be emotional and write music!! all my music was based off emotions.... bleah

im also passionately in love with Jesus Christ. meditating on scripture is really the only thing that calms me and gives me hope anymore. im so ready for this to go away but i know that there is a reason that i am experiencing it and i know that God is in control. Thats really the only way i think i could have true peace in such a crazy situation. and may i just say: how the heck does almost nobody know about this!! its the craziest thing i even could imagine feeling. Like i feel like i lost my mind or ive gone mentally insane. wow, i just think this should be more well known about...

I also have gone through a big depression(was told by counselors its severe) ever since my family moved to florida from michigan. i have been suicidal and i know depression can play a big part in dp....

so ya. weed+insomnia+depression+anxiety= the ideal combination for depersonalization/derealization... or so im told.. guess i was bound to have gotten it eventually.